Take off your smoking jackets and gather round, for today I bring you the trailer for Super Shark Attack, a film that promises to make Sharktopus look like Sharks in Venice. This one comes from director Fred Olen Ray, a man you may know from such films as Super Ninja Bikini Babes, Genie in a String Bikini, Bikini Pirates, Bikini Round-Up, Bikini Chain Gang, The Girl from B.I.K.I.N.I., and Teenage Cavegirl (also known as, you guessed it, Bikini Cavegirl).
This time around, the Macguffin, if you will, is a giant shark that can walk on land, eat planes, and is impervious to bullets, which is of course a grave threat to a woman’s right to wear a bikini. QUICK, TO THE EXPOSITORY DIALOG!
THE PRESIDENT: Bullets bounce off it, it walks around on its fins and it flies!?
ADVISOR: …It’s Super Shark. [DUH]
[…]
WEAPONS EXPERT: It’s a special prototype tank.
SOME DAME: A walking tank?
WEAPONS EXPERT: A walking tank for a walking shark. [BOOM, LOGIC BOMB]
And that’s when, in a scene that will surely go down in history, a WALKING TANK KICKS A WALKING SHARK IN THE FACE. After all, why give a tank legs if not to… KICK ASS. Oh, also, JJ Walker is there (filming in a separate room, it seems). But will he say “DYN-O-MITE?” Unless you watch, you’ll never know.
[i09 via GammaSquad]