Danny DeVito & Rhea Perlman are separating because God is dead

Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman have been married for 30 years, have three kids, and always seemed about the same height and pretty close to equal on the f*ckability scale, not to mention that they’re both ridiculously adorable. As such, they seemed like the perfect couple. And now they’re separating. First mom and dad and now this! Like I told my friends who got married this weekend, we’re all f*cked and there’s no use even pretending anymore.

Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman are separating after 30 years of marriage.
The two married back in 1982 and have 3 children together.
DeVito (5’0″) and Perlman (5’1″) met in 1970 when Rhea went to see an off-Broadway play, The Shrinking Bride … which featured Danny.
The two began dating soon after and lived together for 11 years before tying the knot.
A rep for the couple confirmed the split — but has no further comment at this time. [TMZ]

They’re just separated, not divorced, which is why I’m holding out some hope that Danny can still win her back with some wacky, Mrs. Doubtfire-esque stunt. But that will undoubtedly be harder to pull off once he starts banging Scarlette Johansson.

Picture credit: Helga Esteb / Shutterstock.com