JJ Abrams to direct Star Wars VII

According to a report by The Wrap, Super 8/Star Trek director JJ Abrams is set to take on Star Wars Episode VII for the newly Disney-acquired incarnation of Lucasfilm. With JJ Abrams involved, my level of interest in this project has been officially raised from *shrug* to Code Mouthfart.

Haha, something something lens flares.

Lucasfilm Chief Kathleen Kennedy has been courting Abrams, one of the most successful directors and producers in Hollywood — and a man beloved by fanboys. He runs one of the industry’s top production companies, Bad Robot, and created or co-created television franchises like “Lost,” “Fringe” and “Alias.” He has also directed film spectacles “Mission: Impossible III,” “Star Trek” and “Super 8.”

The lure of the Jedi was too strong, and it will no doubt complicate his relationship with Paramount, where Bad Robot is a top supplier. Abrams has been feverishly working on “Star Trek Into Darkness,” his second Star Trek film since he rebooted the franchise in 2009. “Into Darkness,” still in post-production, opens May 18.

The same guy is directing both Star Wars and Star Trek, shouldn’t that be illegal? I bet some 35-year-old virgins are none to happy about this. Not me though, I get tons of pussy. I have this really hot girlfriend, she goes to Stanford.

I’d like to see a very special Episode of Star Wars, where Han Solo goes to a Take Back The Night rally.