Kickstarter May Have Pushed Uwe Boll Over The Edge: ‘Basically, My Message Is F*ck Yourself’

It’s been a few years since we last checked in with famously disliked German film director Uwe Boll. Back in 2013, he had tried to Kickstart money for Postal 2 in a humorous but frequently misspelled crowdfunding push, along with a video that would’ve seemed amateurish for a high-school kid, let alone a famous movie director, during which he urged fans to take money from children so he could “rape Heidi Klum.”

Now Uwe (OOH-vay) is back with a YouTube confessional about Kickstarter called “f*ck you all” which should give you some indication of how well those Kickstarter campaigns went. Here’s Boll’s opening salvo:

“So yes Uwe Boll, and uh that is the last update, we have only four days to do with the Rampage campaign. And that was my third campaign now, after Postal 2 failed, after Indiegogo for Rampage 3 failed, and now Kickstarter failed too. And… basically my message is f*ck yourself. Because that is so f*cking absurd. What retarded amateur idiots collecting money on that absurd website. We get approached by people like Kickstarter – ‘Do it! Do it!’ – and you have hundred thousand people contacting you to make a fast dime to say ‘I can push your campaign and I get ten percent of whatever you collect.’ And it’s all f*cking bullsh*t and I will never do it in my life again. Crowd funding for me is dead.”

Other gems:

“I have enough money to play golf until I’m dead.”

“You’re easier getting 600,000 dollars if you make a movie about some retarded visit in the forest [?] or for… whatever… Marvel… Avengers bullsh*t dirt. So goodbye, and goodbye Hollywood.”

It’s less a traditional crowd-funding plea than the kind of video you find on someone’s computer after they’ve shot up a school. Which isn’t a great leap to make since “Postal” is already named for the act of going on a mass shooting.

There’s another video where he gets even angrier:

“They’re all f*cking each other in the asses and nobody makes any decisions. All the actors I ever worked with, Ben Kingsley, or whatever, are f*cking pussies.”

SHOTS FIRED. Ben Kingsley? Damn. I hope for Boll’s sake, my boy Special K never hears about this, because from what I’ve been told, Gandhi runs with a crew of “hard, pipe-hitting n***s.”

In all seriousness, I wanted to give to this Kickstarter, to see if we could get it funded and hopefully hear more from Uwe Boll and maybe keep him from killing people. I pledged $50 and started to put in my information before I realized I’d have to give my home address and chickened out.