Mike ‘The Miz’ Mizanin Fights A Team Of Heavily-Armed Mercenaries In ‘The Marine 4’

Back in 2006 I saw a preview for The Marine, starring John Cena, assumed it was some kind of direct-to-DVD homoerotic action porn that didn’t have the budget to get The Rock and never thought about it again. Little did I know then that in 2015, I’d be staring at a press release in my inbox announcing The Marine 4: Moving Target (arriving on Digital HD April 10 and on Blu-ray, DVD and VOD April 21), starring former Real World cast member Mike “The Miz” Mizanin. Life is so full of wonderful surprises like that.

WWE Superstar Mike “The Miz” Mizanin is back as American hero Jake Carter in an all-new thrill-packed Marine adventure. Now in the private sector, Carter is assigned to protect a “high-value package” – a beautiful whistleblower trying to expose a corrupt military defense contractor. But a heavily armed team of mercenaries has been hired to kill her, along with anyone who gets in their way, and it’s going to take a fearless one-man fighting machine to stop them. Co-starring WWE Diva Summer Rae in her feature film debut, THE MARINE 4: MOVING TARGET is locked and loaded with explosive action from start to finish.

This is not to be confused of course with John Cena’s original Marine character, “John Triton.” Which, when you think about it, a “triton” is actually an ancient Greek messenger of the sea. So “john triton” could be interpreted as some kind of mythological toilet prophet. I don’t know how deep these pro wrestling movies go with the symbolism, but it’s there.

A group of diamond thieves on the run kidnap the wife of a recently discharged marine who goes on a chase through the South Carolinian wilderness to retrieve her. [IMDB]

To be honest, after three sequels I kinda hoped the Marine would’ve made it to space by now. Though as long as it’s still locked and loaded with explosive action I’m sure I’ll be satisfied.

Both the Blu-ray and DVD include featurettes that take audiences behind-the-scenes of THE MARINE 4: MOVING TARGET and also offer a retrospective on the entire film franchise.

(*opening riff of Green Day’s “Time Of Your Life” cues up*)(*slow motion footage of John Cena throwing a bad guy into the blades of a helicopter*)

“Firepower” focuses on the film’s intense gun battles to give fans a first-hand look at what goes into the making of these films. “The Franchise” retraces all of The Marine films with interviews and footage featuring the stars and key action scenes. Lastly, “Beauty is Dangerous” places focus on the ladies of THE MARINE 4: MOVING TARGET and how they can look so good while taking care of business!

How do they look so good while taking care of business? I’ve always wondered that. WWE films always knows just the right questions to ask. On a serious note, I think buying one of these films should get your name put on a watch list somewhere. If someone doesn’t make an actual Marine Todd movie within the next five years they’re leaving money on the table.

Also, I tried to search for a trailer for this movie and I swear on my life that this was the first search result:

I am dead now. That is all.