Quickies: Biff Tannen answers your questions in a postcard, Morgan Freeman not marrying his granddaughter

QUICKIES

Tom Wilson, aka Biff Tannen, must get asked about Back to the Future a lot, because he’s compiled a handy postcard to answer the most common questions. It’s basically an analog FAQ section. Among the revelations: Crispin Glover is unusual. So now you know. [via LettersofNote]

Morgan Freeman is not marrying his granddaughter. This one’s a little old, but it seemed important to note that God/the president/Nelson Mandela is not actually f*cking his step granddaughter. “The recent reports of any pending marriage or romantic relationship of me to anyone are defamatory fabrications from the tabloid media designed to sell papers.” That damned National Enquirer, they’re less trustworthy than John Travolta’s masseuse. [CNN]

Roman Polanski is doing a movie about the Dreyfuss Affair. Speaking of banging children, Roman Polanski has announced that his next film will be D, a spy story about The Dreyfuss Affair, an 1890s political scandal in which a Jewish officer in the French Army was wrongly accused of spying for zee Germans. I’m sure there’s a child-rape joke in there somewhere, but all I can think about is that Dreyfus supporters were known as “Dreyfusards,” and how much I wish it had been “Dreyfus’tards.” [THR]

Facebook co-founder Eduardo Saverin (Andrew Garfield in The Social Network) has renounced his US citizenship. Sounds like a very un-Spiderman move, if you ask me. Saverin’s people say the move was required by strict rules on what US citizens are allowed to invest in, and not a way to avoid taxes. Though I’m sure if you ask Aaron Sorkin, it was all just some present-day manifestation of a character flaw developed during a dramatic event in Saverin’s childhood that he’s been trying to run away from ever since. [CNNMoney/Yahoo]

Tribeca acquires The Comedy, a non-Tim & Eric movie starring Tim Heidecker.

 Tribeca Film announced today that it has acquired all North American rights to The Comedy, director Rick Alverson’s provocative character study, which is already one of the most talked about films since it bowed at the 2012 Sundance Film Festival. The film, which Variety called “compulsively fascinating,” and Film Threat noted as “one of the most wildly inappropriate and pitch black comedies I’ve ever seen” also played South by Southwest and is set for BAMcinemaFEST this June, will be released in October 2012.

On the cusp of inheriting his father’s estate, Swanson (Tim Heidecker, “Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!”) is a man with unlimited options. An aging hipster in Brooklyn, he spends his days in aimless recreation with like-minded friends (“Tim & Eric” co-star Eric Wareheim, LCD Soundsystem frontman James Murphy and comedian Gregg Turkington a.k.a.“Neil Hamburger”) in games of comic irreverence and mock sincerity. As Swanson grows restless of the safety a sheltered life offers him, he tests the limits of acceptable behavior, pushing the envelope in every way he can. Heidecker’s deadpan delivery cleverly masks a deep desire for connection and sense in the modern world. The Comedy wears its name on its sleeve, but director Rick Alverson’s powerful and provocative character study touches a darkness behind the humor that resonates with viewers long after the story ends.

So am I stupid for not realizing “Neil Hamburger” wasn’t his actual name? Because I thought that was his real name. I feel so used.

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