Weekend Movie Guide: ‘Godzilla’ Is Here To Crush Every Movie In Its Path

Opening Everywhere: Godzilla, Million Dollar Arm

Opening Somewhere: The Immigrant, Wolf Creek 2

FilmDrunk Suggests: I’m very interested in seeing how Disney turns the very boring true story of Million Dollar Arm into an actual movie, especially since Rinku Singh is making the media rounds dressed like Dracula from Blade: Trinity. Vince also liked Godzilla, and you should watch it and read his review so you can argue with him like the rest of the critic police.

Godzilla

Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 73% critics, 82% audience

Gratuitous Review Quotes:

It’s a tad better than the 1998 Godzilla, perhaps, but that’s not saying much. – Peter Rainer, Christian Science Monitor

It’s a smooth, sleek, technologically awe-inspiring 3-D blockbuster with a top-shelf cast (speaking middle-to-lower-shelf dialogue most of the time, to be sure, but they do it with style). – Dana Stevens, Slate

Armchair Analysis: I got to see a sneak preview of this new Godzilla and I really liked it, but I thought this scene was really strange…

Million Dollar Arm

Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 56% critics, 72% audience

Gratuitous Review Quotes:

Hamm and Bell are likeable actors with terrific timing. The location shots in Mumbai are beautiful, chaotic and jarring. The script is amusing. – Shawna Richer, Globe and Mail

[A] watchable but rambling, flaccid movie … – Stephen Holden, New York Times

Armchair Analysis: I don’t ever like to tip my pitches when it comes to the year’s worst movies, but Draft Day is definitely in a small group of frontrunners right now, and I think that really helps Million Dollar Arm’s chances. I loved The Rookie and thought Invincible was good enough, but Disney has taken on a story in Million Dollar Arm that just doesn’t have all the right pieces. Maybe the early parts of the story are interesting, but they’re going to have to take some serious liberties with this one to make the ending special. I’m sure they will, but that’s cheap. Fortunately, Draft Day was so awful that Million Dollar Arm could be about John Rocker and it would probably still be heartwarming.

The Immigrant

Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 83% critics, 54% audience (WOOF!)

Gratuitous Review Quotes:

Call it a novelistic film, if you must. But know that it is a cinematic film, too. And above all – a James Gray one. – Stephen Whitty, Newark Star-Ledger

The film is earnestly and unabashedly melodramatic to an extent that may baffle audiences accustomed to clever, knowing historical fictions. But it also has a depth and purity of feeling that makes other movies feel timid and small by comparison. – A.O. Scott, New York Times

Armchair Analysis: I don’t like to make really controversial statements, but Marion Cotillard makes my eyes happy.

Wolf Creek 2

Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 48% critics, 44% audience (DOUBLE WOOF!)

Gratuitous Review Quotes:

“Wolf Creek 2” is gory, disturbing, inventive, twisted and rather well made. – Tom Long, Detroit News

Ultimately the sequel’s raisons d’être seem to be emulating superior movies, from “Deliverance” to “Joy Ride” to “Saw.” – Martin Tsai, L.A. Times

Armchair Analysis: I said it in the Summer Movie Guide and I’ll say it again – an Australian movie that doesn’t feature Paul Hogan as the hero? No thanks, mate.