Spice Doesn’t Flow For Dune Film

Paramount’s attempt to get another Dune adaptation off the ground has failed, as their requirement to greenlight production by now hasn’t been met.  Deadline reports:

“Paramount’s option has expired and we couldn’t reach an agreement,” said Richard P. Rubinstein, who controls the rights to what is considered the biggest-selling science fiction book ever. “I’m going to look at my options, and whether I wind up taking the script we developed in turnaround, or start over, I’m not sure yet.”

Paramount paid something in the six figures for the option, but they may be able to recoup some of that money if they sell the script to the next studio which wants to adapt Dune.  Everyone involved approved of the script by Chase Palmer but finding a director and getting Paramount to commit $100 million to the production proved problematic.  Peter Berg (Hancock) dropped out to direct an alien-invasion movie based on a board game instead.  Pierre Morel (Taken, Banlieue 13) signed to direct but also dropped out to direct another alien-invasion movie (Earth Defense Force, produced by Sam Raimi).  Aliens are the new Nazis in the politically correct, “don’t offend anyone by our choice of villain” zeitgeist.  GRRR, word a day calendars!

Anyway, If Rubinstein were willing to approve of an adaptation costing less than $100 million, we’ll gladly make it happen.  We’ll just need my cat and a coat sleeve, and the rest can be handled in voiceover by someone doing a David Lynch impression.  It’ll still make more sense than Sting in a metal bikini.