We Read "Wesley Crusher: Teenage F*** Machine" So You Don't Have To

We read this for two reasons: 1) it was free on Kindle with Prime; we wouldn’t have paid the $4 the author wants otherwise. 2) It was titled “Wesley Crusher: Teenage F*** Machine”. There are some train wrecks you just have to watch.

And God help us, after reading the whole thing, we’re still not sure whether it’s completely serious or one of the single most brutal satires of fanfic ever written. The prolific career of author Kitty Glitter, with titles like “A Strange Case of Dicklessness” and “The Feline Puerto Rican”, would tend towards “brutal satire”, especially since the author bio reads like a racist tract.

On the other hand, an introduction of “Meow Solo”, a cat-like alien with a barbed wang, and the fact that Picard gets shot in the dong at one point (by Moriarty) reads like legit bad fanfic.

Either way, it’s the most hilariously craptastic erotic fanfic we’ve read since “Star Trek: The Next Fornication”, or as one review put it, this is worth the $0 you should pay for it. Twice that, even!

[ via the poor souls at Lifehacker ]

image courtesy Paramount Television

Around The Web