10 Easy Rules All The Women Of ‘Sin City: A Dame To Kill For’ Follow

The trailer for 'Sin City: A Dame To Kill For' wants women to know exactly where they stand…which is as glorified blow-up dolls. Sure the trailer is only a little over a minute long, but Frank Miller and company use that time to show exactly what to expect from this side-quel to the 2005 hit film. Disguised as 'gritty' film noir where the men are sociopathic men and the women are dames who can only pick from the career choices of stripper, prostitute, gold-digger, or girlfriend. If they want to be 'well-rounded' they're allowed to pick two of those options as long as they follow the rules.

#1 – Women don't have agency. 

A bold title like 'A Dame To Kill For' let's you know right out the gate that agency is something for the guys, not the dames. Ladies need not worry about frivolities like protecting themselves…that's what big buff men are for. After all, they have to defend their property.

#2 – Being fully clothed is forbidden.

Women in 'Sin City' don't need silly things like pants, or actual shirts. Drunkenly cavorting about planning murder in heels and a bustier is all in a day's work. Of course, everyone knows she'll have to find a dude to actually pull the trigger or the universe will implode.

#3 – You are desirable pieces, not a whole person.

 When you have a film that uses color to pull focus only on specific details, you have to wonder at the choices when the only time women appear in color is when they're being sexualized – seen here – or idolized – seen later by referring to the woman in the blue dress as an angel.

#4 – Assertive woman are scary alien creatures. 

Ahhh yes, the old 'woman is naked while the man is fully clothed' chestnut. If you know anything about the story at all, this trope is lovingly paired with a side of The Vamp…because if a woman is using her sexuality as a weapon without the guidance of a man, that makes her evil. Obviously.

#5 – Always look pleasing to the male gaze.

Is there a specialized major in 'Advanced Sexy Panting' at stripper school where they teach their charges how to always make sure to be attractive to men, even when in a rage or sobbing uncontrollably? If so, Nancy was valedictorian.

#6 – Never wear more clothing than your man.

Remember ladies, men must always be fully dressed. Or if not fully dressed, they must be presented in such a way that is not demoralizingly to their self-esteem as they are considered people. This rule does not apply to you however, so be sure to stand behind convenient steam to keep this rating under NC-17.

#7- Do not appear to age lest you become less attractive.

Look, this GIF really speaks for itself. But just in case…it's been nine years and in that time Jessica Alba has become a wife, a mother, and a business owner. But when it comes to acting, she better slim down to pass for her twenty-four year old self and shake it if she wants to get paid.

#8 – Do not fight your own* battles. 

There is a pecking order to the seedy underbelly of Sin City. Recall that dames are too kill for, not killers. Always demurely stand aside so your man can defend your dubious honor.

#9 – *Unless you can do it sexily. 

The only exception to this rule is as follows: If you are a woman considered 'exotic' by the majority standards of the male gaze you are allowed to be the Dragon Lady. However, you must do so in a way that is both sexy, non-threatening, and completely insulting to your culture.

#10 – And above all, always remember the only thing you're good for.