I never thought we’d reach this part of the competition and Gina Marie, Amanda AND Aaryn would still be in the race. But, go figure. Candice and Judd were sent packing on Thursday, and we’re now left with a smattering of smart power players, bullies, floaters, idiots and racists (some contestants, of course, fall into multiple categories). Yay!
Because so much happened during the double elimination, we rewind to Candice’s tumultuous exit from the house. What we didn’t see earlier (unless we were watching the 24/7 feed) was Gina Marie and Candice barking at one another like rabid hyenas during the elimination. Aaryn, who seems to have done a complete racist reversal to become a delicate Disney princess in recent weeks, feels like she’s going to throw up in the face of such insensitivity. She may even need to distance herself from Gina Marie, you guys!
But everyone seems pretty appalled that Gina Marie would to take a slam at Candice by sneering that her mom didn’t want her. As Helen explains, Candice is adopted, so this is even more insulting than it seems to be.
After we race through Aaryn’s HoH win, we get to how Judd got backdoored, which is still somewhat stunning. Yes, Helen was pulling the strings, but Amanda still suspected he was the secret MVP when it wasn’t Elissa, and it seems Aaryn, Amanda and Helen all agreed he was a “brilliant” player who just played dumb and was somehow evil. Is it really possible to play dumb when you’re locked in a house with a bunch of people 24/7 for many, many weeks? I just don’t think it’s entirely possible for anyone to be something other than what they really are under these conditions, no matter how brilliant or devious they might be. I think Judd’s only real crime was that he was likable.
As everyone prepares to vote, Judd calmly pleads for his life. He doesn’t understand why Aaryn thought he was playing her (I have no idea why she said that, so if someone has insight, please explain). He pledges loyalty to anyone and everyone who won’t send him home. Instead of looking him in the eye, Aaryn sobs. Amanda cries. Andy cries.
As Judd exits, he seems to hug everyone, but makes it clear to Elissa and Helen he doesn’t want their hugs. I don’t get the impression Elissa is even playing the game anymore, so I think he may have just wanted to resent Helen alone.
Meanwhile, Andy feels icky and McCrae feels heartbroken, and both of them need some time alone to process the fact that they’ve sent one of their best friends in the house packing.
Hamsters gather in clumps to grieve. Andy sobs. This is the first one that really hurts! Uh-huh, Amanda says, totally disingenuously. I elect Amanda as the hamster most likely to eat her young! Do I hear a second?
There’s no time for mourning, though, because the hamsters need to dive into another awesomely stupid HoH competition! This is essentially a fair ground game in which the hamsters have to roll a ball toward a cup. Seriously, could CBS maybe hire that kid Caine to set up some competitions for this show? Because whoever is doing this for “Big Brother” is obviously tired.
Anyway, the hamsters must go head-to-head. First up, Helen vs. Jessie. Jessie wins. Jessis has hope! Maybe, just maybe, she won’t go home this week!
Andy is up against Gina Marie and wins. Amanda goes up against Spencer and wins. Spencer is crushed, because he knows he’s going on the block again. Maybe someone will get him a customized chair so he can be more comfortable. McCrae beats Elissa. First round over!
Second round, Andy beats Jessie and snuffs out the little flicker of hope she had held in her heart. Then, we have Amanda versus McCrae.
Did you know that one of the rules of being in a showmance is that the guy will throw competitions for you? No wonder Amanda hooked up with McCrae! That, and cheap pizzas when they get out of the “Big Brother” house!
But McCrae did not get this memo (or did not sign the binging showmance contract), because he easily beats Amanda’s ass. She blinks, gives him a hard look, then whimpers like a kicked dog on the sidelines. How COULD he embarrass her this way?
Of course, McCrae probably can’t focus on the task at hand knowing Amanda is going to give him a wedgie or just scream at him for hours for his cruelty, so he loses the final round of this stupid HoH to Andy. Andy is so excited!
But now he has the horrible job of having to pick four people to be Have Nots for the week! Helen volunteers — which is REALLY smart. Then, Elissa, GIna Marie and Aaryn also raise their hands. With Andy, it seems like an easy way to earn some good will (or at least enough good will to stay off the block), and hey, maybe it’s an easy diet plan.
As expected, McCrae and Amanda fight. She’s so hurt! It wouldn’t have been so hard to throw it! I think it wouldn’t be so hard for Amanda to stop being the worst girlfriend in the universe, but that’s just me. I can’t even get on the girl power train for Amanda, that’s how miserable she’s been lately.
Oh, and America, don’t forget to pick your have-not food — cottage cheese and cow peas, turnips and taffy, or head cheese and habaneros.
I would love for CBS to have a very special “Where Are They Now?: ‘Big Brother’ edition” so we can find out if any of the Have Nots of past seasons eternally swore off whatever they got stuck with. Not that it would be hard to swear off head cheese.
Goody, it’s time for Helen to comfort crazy Amanda! “Look how many people are loyal and devoted to you!” Helen chirps. Amanda sniffles, then gets up. She doesn’t want to call attention to herself she says as she obviously calls attention to herself.
Jessie thinks Amanda needs to get over it, and I don’t disagree. Instead, she wanders into the bathroom to whine to McCrae about how she hasn’t seen her family in forever. McCrae tells her to calm the hell down and remember that they still control the game thanks to their alliance with Andy, but they won’t be getting blood on their hands. Amanda assures him she’s not mad, just hurt. And disappointed. And sad. And OH MY GOD, remember when Amanda was funny? And smarter than your average hamster? Oh, how I misjudged her.
Andy soon discovers how not fun it can be to be HoH. He tells Helen he’s putting up Jessie and Spencer, and she says that’s fine, but suggests he put up Amanda and McCrae instead. Andy tells Helen he thinks they’re totally trustworthy, so no reason! Although this is Andy’s way of warning her to slow her roll, she keeps hammering away at how he needs to make a Big Move and how important it is to his game to send them packing. Helen, have you ever made sure you have an alliance with Andy? Well, he’s realizing he needs to pick a side. Yes, Andy, you do.
I think Helen is misjudging how malleable Andy is, and putting Amanda and McCrae against one another means one will survive to come after whoever did the evil deed in the first place.
Time to draw keys! They go to…
Gina Marie
Helen
McCrae
Aaryn (okay, someone please tell me, did McCrae actually call her Poopy? I am praying I misheard.)
Amanda
and Elissa
Thus, Andy’s done what he said he was going to do — he nominated Jessie and Spencer. Helen thinks she’s going to keep an eye on Andy to see where his loyalties lie, and Spencer and Jessie are sweating bullets. I don’t see Andy backdooring anyone, but if Helen keeps leaning on him to change his vote, we might — and it could be Helen.
Who do you think will go home? What did you think of Amanda fighting with McCrae? And were you surprised by how nasty Gina Marie was to Candice?