You might guess that “Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2” is the cinematic equivalent of a greasy paper plate that should be wadded up and thrown away outside a Sbarro, and you, sir or madam, are a good guesser.
Critics and Twitter pundits agree that the new Kevin James flick is bad for humankind. But there's an upside here: Hilarious comments about bad movies are good for humankind. We've rounded up ten good (and/or just irreverent) takedowns of “PBMC2” and ranked them for your disgusted pleasure.
10. The philosophical take.
“This oft-ridiculed screen giant is here to answer a question that has plagued mankind for decades now: what would a film be like if every single person involved made as little effort as humanly possible?”
9. Does Blart imitate life?
“[Paul Blart] is barely anything at all; a stereotype of a stereotype; a half-remembered punchline; a stomach with a mustache and wheels.”
8. Paul Blart is not (hilariously) (un-) funny (enough) (ever).
This wisp of a plot is just an excuse for James to do his one trick over and over: Bluster, then screw up humiliatingly. Is it never funny? No, it”s not never funny. It”s just not funny nearly often enough.”
7. It's a joke for now, but I bet we'll get a “Paul Blart 3” set in the Old West.