Scientists are trying to clone a woolly mammoth

I really, really want a puppy. I spend hours every week scrolling through Pet Finder and visiting shelter sites. I have names picked out for each breed I’d like to get (Morty for a bulldog, Pops Staples for a pug). I would have said that a puppy is the thing in the world I want the most, until I learned that it will soon be possible to have a woolly mammoth. Sorta.

What’s going on is that scientists in Russia have uncovered the remarkably well-preserved remains of a female woolly hidden under Siberian ice. They’ve been able to extract blood and tissue samples from the creature, which is pretty amazing considering the thing has been dead for between 10,000 and 15,000 years. The she-mammoth is in such good shape because she’s been hanging out in pure ice in the middle of the Siberian tundra, just floating there for centuries, all woolly and regal. When the scientists cut into her stomach, blood actually gushed out at them, which is both awesome and totally gross.

What happens next is that the scientist will attempt to find live cells that will enable them to clone the creature. Apparently their odds of coming up with what they need are pretty good, as this is the most well-preserved woolly mammoth that’s ever been discovered. So, maybe coming soon: a clone of a woolly mammoth. I will name her Gertrude and get her a custom leash.