Want to see what happens when crowdfunding shows Uwe Boll what he’s worth?

Someone peed in Uwe Boll's cereal, and the results are delightful.

Whenever I see someone bag Ed Wood as “the worst filmmaker ever,” I try to engage them in that conversation and offer up the alternative view that no one, no matter how desperately lacking in talent, can ever be considered the worst filmmaker of all time when their movies are so painfully sincere and personally revealing. I would argue that cynicism is far worse than lack of talent, and when you're talking about people who are genuinely terrible filmmakers, Uwe Boll is as cynical as they come.

He was evidently seeking to raise financing for a new “film” called “Rampage 3,” which I presume would be the second sequel to his detestable psycho-on-a-rampage piece of griefsploitation. Someone talked him into crowdfunding it, which ended up having a two-part positive impact. First, the crowdfunding efforts failed, so we've apparently been spared the movie. Second, he appears to have thrown a tantrum and done us all the favor of uploading it to YouTube.

That is funny in so many ways. He apparently thinks that both “Harry Potter” and the Marvel movies are crowdfunded, and he also still lives in a world where “retarded” is an acceptable insult.

If you want to understand Boll, this short video is pretty much all you need. He is a snarling, stupid, ugly thug of a man who thinks that punching someone in the face solves every problem, and when he is “directing” a film, he can only occasionally be bothered to actually look at what's happening on his set. He is a tax shelter with feet, and watching him get this mad at the realization that no one cares if he ever gets behind a camera again is a lovely dose of schadenfreude to start the week.

“Rampage 3” will be in theaters never. Woo-hoo!

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