Watch: Justin Bieber and Chris Brown survive Armageddon in ‘Next 2 U’ clip

What kind of fresh hell is this?  Gather ’round kids, this is what happens when people have too much power, money and ego and no one will tell them their idea is bad.

A nearly  8-minute rough cut of the Chris Brown/Justin Bieber video for “Next 2 U” has escaped whatever editing bay in which it was sequestered and surfaced on Bossip.

The duet is a wafer-thin, sweet Bruno Mars-like ditty about about sticking by someone through good and bad- and wanting them to have your baby. We always took the light about “One day when the sky is falling, I”ll be standing right there next to you” to be more a pledge of loyalty, not a literal one. As the video shows, we were wrong.

The sky actually falls in the Colin Tilley-directed video that is a cross between “Battle: Los Angeles” and “Armageddon.” But first, we need a little exposition. there”s an important plot here, people. For three minutes, before a note of the song is played, we have Brown and some lovely lady dirty dancing and doing the Running Man in a New York loft and Bieber and some pretty girl sharing some G-rated groping before, in true “Romeo and Juliet” fashion, her father comes and yanks the star-crossed lovers apart.

Then random explosions start happening,  all hell breaks loose so Bieber and Brown break into song. We like the random shots, like a teddy bear and the replica of Rodin”s “The Thinker.”  Deep. Everything is destroyed, except for the movie theater marquee with Chris Brown, “F.A.M.E.” on it (the song is from that album). And they say miracles don”t happen.

Chaos ensues, fire erupts, buildings crumble, people look terrified and these two fine fellows keep singing and dancing through the apocalypse.  There”s a lot of time shifting, but as far as we can tell, one couple has a happy ending, one does not. But you”ll have to watch for yourself to find out.

What do you think of “Next 2 U?” Do you smell Oscar? 

 

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