Congress Does Something Useful For Once And Moves To Ban In-Flight Calls

Last month we told you the FCC had lost its mind and was going to try and lift the ban on in-flight calls, because everything is terrible and air travel should be pain. Fortunately, Congress is acting to ensure you can at least have a relatively quiet time in coach.

Specifically, Rep. Bill Shuster, chairman of the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, has written a bill called the Prohibiting In-Flight Voice Communications on Mobile Wireless Devices Act of 2013. It’s pretty straightforward; basically it would make it illegal to use your phone for voice communications on an airplane, and that’s it. Sadly, it does not ban those annoying seatback phones, but we guess you can’t have everything.

Shuster is actually well in line with the American public’s way of thinking; the idea of having to be in coach for five hours while some self-styled “very important person” yells into his phone about his meeting the whole time is not unreasonably seen as hellish.

Of course, a bill is not a law; this will have to pass Congress, be approved by the Senate, and then signed by the President. On the other hand, we can’t think of anything that engenders more goodwill or bipartisanship, something that will unite the two parties, quite like telling annoying people on airplanes to shut the hell up. This might finally herald a new spirit of partnership and cooperation on Capital Hill.

Or not, but either way, this needs to happen. Either that or airplanes need to start hard-coding the chorus of CAKE’S “Nugget” into their PA system electronics.