Of the things I know I will never attempt in my life — a short list that includes bungee jumping, skydiving, and camping for more than two days — I can now safely add riding on a hoverboard. I’m sorry, self-balancing scooter—a term the wheeled Segway knockoffs, which were recently banned in London, are also commonly known as since they don’t actually hover.
And why would I never try riding on one of these things? Because as this fail compilation video demonstrates (which was oddly uploaded by a hoverboard manufacturer), they look really, really dangerous — as unregulated products from China tend to be! Still, you show me a video of a person falling that’s not funny, and I show you… I don’t know, a safe unregulated product from China?