Nobody Has To Pay A Cent For America Seeing Janet Jackson’s Nipple

Speaking of NFL halftime shows, remember how we, as a culture, freaked the hell out over seeing a boob on national TV back in 2004? How people whined and complained they were offended, not by grown men beating each other into brain damage and reduced quality of life, but by a three-second image of a nipple? How CBS and its stations got the crap fined out of them for it?

Yeah, turns out they don’t have to pay a dime.

Why? The Internet! The court issuing the ruling, which was ordered to reconsider it by the Supreme Court in the best case of “ugh, you deal with this” ever, said that the FCC’s rules weren’t clear about boob flashes at the time (before you think broadcast TV is saved: the rules are clear now), and also admitted that we can find images of boobs with a Wifi signal and five seconds. In short, actual adults made a ruling, not some Midwest ninnies worried Ms. Jackson-if-you’re-nasty’s nipple erased Jesus from their young child’s minds. Hooray! Now let’s get some boobs on broadcast TV.