Beer is the gateway to many things. One or two beers can enhance pretty much anything, albeit too many beers can quickly lead to poor decision-making. But, apparently, there is something in beer that can make you smarter, if you know where to find it.
Oregon State University researchers, and really, did you expect anybody else to research this, have found that a compound in hops called xanthohumol makes you more intelligent. Or, at least, it makes young mice smarter. An eight-week diet with the extremely rare flavonoid found that young mice performed better on cognitive tests. It only worked on young mice, however, which, while disappointing, is not the worst thing in the world.
Stripping away the other excuse to drink beer at work, you’d need to put away roughly 2,000 liters of beer a day to get the proper dosage. While some people have taken a shot at this, it’s pretty much impossible, as evidenced by alcohol poisoning and the massive heart attack inhaling 300,000 to 400,000 calories a day would net you.
Also, we’re talking about making children drink. Child Protective Services would have something to say about that. That said, this is good news for children born with cognitive disabilities, as the compound might help them improve cognitive function and lead better lives. That isn’t quite beer making us geniuses, but hey, we guess limiting human suffering is OK, too.