Finally You Can Drink Soda And Eat Barbecue Brisket From The Same Bottle

AMERICA F*CK YE…*clutches chest*

Phew, the old tinker almost shut down there. Guess I shouldn’t have fake chugged and imaginary devoured that fictional Big Red BBQ Bottle, which needs to exist so I can bring myself that much closer to sugary, savory death. But alas, for now at least, it’s only in this clip, from the very real Texas-based soda brand Big Red.

I’ve never wanted something I saw on the Internet to be real more than this, except for “friends.”