Someone Imagined Guy Fieri Without His Trademark Frosted Tips And Beard, And It’s Horrifying

We often tease Guy Fieri for his ridiculous look — namely the frosted tips and goatee, though his silliness goes several layers deeper — but what if he actually took our criticisms to heart and hopped on the first train out of Flavortown in favor of a more subdued look?

Twitter user @gewqk brought the artist’s rendering above to our attention (original image here), and it’s so damn weird. It feels odd saying this, but: quick, someone douse it with Donkey Sauce! Inexplicably, Soccer Dad Guy Fieri is more terrifying than the manufactured version we’re so familiar with.