— Jared Keller (@jaredbkeller) December 29, 2015
The above image is blowing up on social media after having been tweeted out by Maxim editor Jared Keller on Monday night, although its exact provenance is unknown. Like “the dress” before it, the image has people fervently debating: just how would a dog wear pants? Along with most sensible people, I stand firmly in Dog #2 Camp, because obviously the entire point of pants is to cover your b-hole and your privates. However, there are plenty of reasoned arguments for both sides. Probably my favorite so far was this answer from Reddit, where the image has (of course) also popped up:
Well pants are a human invention so if they were to wear them like humans it would be like the ones on the right. However, if dogs invented dog pants it would be like the ones on the left, leaving the [a-hole] freely available for greetings and ice breakers
People on Twitter likewise had plenty to say, with many citing actual photographic evidence of how a dog would wear pants. Here are just a few responses:
https://twitter.com/ArnottACBJ/status/681678524562968577
https://twitter.com/CeleciaKitty_/status/681685596029452292
@jaredbkeller Either way, the belt loops seem a bit senseless.
— Sarah Parker Ward, PhD (@SKParkerWard) December 29, 2015
@jaredbkeller @MaraWritesStuff pic.twitter.com/jpRdOG0tx0
— Amu (@nefertitillated) December 29, 2015
https://twitter.com/jason_pontin/status/681679844007129091
https://twitter.com/OliviaDeJesus17/status/681707978404315136
HDHDHDKSLSKSNDNFB RT @gingersospicy_: RT @jaredbkeller: pic.twitter.com/nn202c8DTZ
— Ski Mask Shawty (@haveyouheardofg) December 29, 2015
https://twitter.com/esteeeo/status/681695677731098624
@jaredbkeller the 2nd. Can't have your ass hanging out. Unless he's a dog that's also a plumber.
— ImALegendKiller (@ImALegendKiller) December 29, 2015
@jaredbkeller @SGZip42 Oh, no, no, no, no…..He would be obedient and PC!! pic.twitter.com/BlfwFGaXjy
— 📻 FernwoodHouse (@Judith_Kirby) December 29, 2015
@jaredbkeller @SarahSpain Deputy Dawg weighs in. pic.twitter.com/Uz19lRvR8P
— Mark Desimone (@MarkDe5150) December 29, 2015
@jaredbkeller @HayesBrown pic.twitter.com/s3MYvt1tcE
— AB (@AlannaBennett) December 29, 2015
https://twitter.com/polly/status/681716505348812800
https://twitter.com/iamatoffees/status/681793058048991232
https://twitter.com/emilymcconneII/status/681793125929631744
Despite an overwhelming inclination towards the second dog, I have a feeling this won’t be the last we’ve heard of the great dog wearing pants debate of 2015. It doesn’t count until Fox News has weighed in.