Police In England Are Looking For A Serial Pool Pooper Responsible For Shutting Down A Water Rave

A “Rave Wave,” an event where teenagers dance to disco music in a wave pool, has been put on hold in Falmouth, England because someone keeps pooping in the water. The suspect, aged 8-14, waits until the lights go off before dropping the deuce.

Parents, horrified staff, and the local paper are all wondering the same thing: “Poo Dunnit?”

(We would have also accepted, “Who’s the Party Pooper?”)

A spokesman said: “It seems a customer is purposely defecating in our centre, the customer being one of the children aged between eight years and 14 years old attending the session.

“I would like to assure our customers this poses no health and safety threat to other members of the public using our facility.

Wait, swimming in poop isn’t a safety concern? That seems kind of odd, no?

“Our water is treated by ultra violet light and we use chlorine as a further measure of disinfection.

“The water treatment and disinfection we use is more than enough to remove any harmful bacteria from the water, as do the cleaning chemicals we use for the poolside, changing areas, showers and toilets.”

Well that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Disregard the doodie floating in the pool everyone, chlorine will fix that right up.

[Western Morning News]