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Florida Twin Sisters Got Into A Brawl Because Of A Man And A Dildo

The headline suggests this is something out of a really bad porn but I assure you it’s not. This is just another day in, you guessed it, Florida. A woman named Heidi Creamer (no, really) and her twin sister Holly got into a nasty brouhaha because of a man. According to police, Heidi punched Holly in the face sparking the fight, which included hair pulling, scratching, kicking and a huge dildo (I added the huge part). How the dildo got there and how (or if) it was used in the fight remains a mystery.

Bow chicka wow wow!

When police arrived at the pair’s Ellenton apartment, Heidi was locked outside, pounding on the front door and screaming obscenities at her bloodied sister. Heidi was “screaming and her body was shaking,” noted a cop, who added that Creamer “attempted to break free from my grasp several times.”

Heidi was hauled off to jail, charged with domestic battery. She has a history of drunk driving and fighting.

But back to the dildo, because really, that’s why we’re all here.

Did one sister borrow it? That’s really the only thing that makes sense here, right? Why else would you get mad at a dildo? Or maybe like the boyfriend used it? And the one sister watched it happen. Hmmm. Actually, this is getting good. Florida, you’re so full of pornographic script material. I heart you.

[The Smoking Gun]

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