This Bear Stuck Between Two Rocks Is The Fat Man In All Of Us

Let’s lay our cards on the table guys, let’s have a frank discussion about the fattest thing you’ve ever done. Me? I once ate a large pizza and 37 hot wings in 30 minutes. Also, I ate at a Ponderosa by myself. Am I ashamed of that last admission? Sure, a little. But whatever, at least I’m not this bear whose fatass got stuck between two rocks—all because he was looking for food. There’s Yogi Bear fat and there’s this a-hole.

For what it’s worth, no, I’ve never risked life and limb for food. I did once sprain at a knee at an Old Country Buffet, but ask me about that another time. This is about the bear, after all.