This Florida Man Learned The Hard Way Why You Don’t Pee On Waitresses

Key West sounds like a fun place. Last weekend at the famous Rick’s Bar, supposedly Key West’s “largest bar complex,” (which is also home to a house band called The Durtbags FYI), Orion Jones — the 20-year-old patron you see in the above mugshot — was arrested for peeing on a waitress from an above balcony.

Despite having a pretty rad-sounding name, peeing on waitresses is NOT cool, as Orion Jones discovered once cops arrived and tased him twice before finally getting him in handcuffs. On the plus side he probably didn’t pee himself while getting tased since, you know, he already took care of that prior to his arrest. The Smoking Gun reports:

Waitress Tia Cruz, 26, told police that she was talking with a customer when she “began feeling something wet on her body.” Cruz initially thought it was raining, police noted, until a fellow employee “pointed out Jones and said he is peeing on you,” according to a police report.

Jones was then chased through the bar by bouncers, who pinned him to the ground until police arrived. He was subsequently charged with disorderly intoxication and resisting arrest. Jones has two marijuana possession convictions on his rap sheet, as well as arrests for burglary and trespassing.

According to The Smoking Gun, the reporting officer stated that: “In speaking with Jones, Jones expressed his desire to seek help for his alcohol problem.” Which is kind of sad, considering that Orion Jones isn’t even of legal drinking age yet. There’s only one path from here and leads to a van down by the river.

(Via BroBible)