A man from Moldova, a small Eastern European country between Romania and Ukraine, had his penis bitten almost completely off when he reportedly tried to force himself on a friend of his wife’s. According to the UK Metro, 53-year-old Florin Ionita was found with his pants around his ankles “clutching his private parts and moaning in pain” in a local park after he and his wife were having a picnic with friends.
His wife had allegedly left to go drop friends off at home, leaving her husband alone with another 24-year-old female friend when the attempted assault occurred. Apparently, that’s pretty much par for the course in Moldova, though?
The man’s wife Maria, 49, said she had forgiven her husband for the alleged incident, “as he was only trying to do what all men try to do, but when I called the ambulance I didn’t do it too fast, and I told them not to hurry.”
She also did not give the ambulance drivers very clear directions to the place in the park in Chisinau, the capital of the Republic of Moldova, where her husband was waiting in agony.
Ionita’s excuse to his wife was that he “just wanted to pass the time pleasantly.” Uhhh, by allegedly mouth-raping her friend? Okay. However, if convicted, he still faces five years in jail. And even though his wife made her husband wait an excruciatingly long time before receiving medical attention, I guess he should be lucky that they weren’t in China, where a philandering man’s wife will just show up at the hospital to finish the job.