Two Awesomely-Safe Ways To Launch A Machete

03.31.11 8 years ago 2 Comments

Internet commenters are known for many things: bad grammar, casual xenophobia, having no cognitive dissonance while insulting the looks of a solid ten while being a four at best themselves, bullying teenage girls 20 years their junior, and blaming political figures for their lost car keys.  Now they can finally claim responsibility for something positive: convincing two guys to build machete-propelling systems on a dare.  All is forgiven, internet commenters.  You done good.

The first video shows what happens when a commenter asks a slingshot enthusiast why his slingshots can’t fire machetes if they’re so great.  Well, the commenter really just asked if he could fire machetes, but the accusation was implied and so the gauntlet was thrown, and soon, the machete was thrown as well.  Slingshot maker Jörg Sprave of The Slingshot Channel built a machete slingshot / crossbow measuring more than six feet long.  He also shows off a surprisingly small cut on his arm from when the machete misfired.  It misfired.  The machete misfired.  And he somehow just got a scratch.  And kept firing it anyway, succeeding in embedding the machete in six thick layers of cardboard.  That’s dedication.  Wait, no, insanity.  I sometimes say “dedication” when I mean “insanity”.  Example: I blog every day because I’m dedicated.

The second video shows what happens when a commenter asks a far-fetched question about guns and another commenter suggests they buy “a gatling gun that shoots rocket propelled machetes” and then a third commenter shouts “Eureka!” and starts building a rocket propelled machete rig.  Sensible.  Skip to 1:18 on the second video if you don’t want the backstory and just want rocket machete goodness.  I already called dibs on “rocket machete goodness” as a band name.

[Hat tip and fancy new rocket skates to Hackaday and Neatorama.]

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