The Best And Worst Of WWE NXT 2/3/16: Apollo Splashes Down


Previously on the Best and Worst of NXT: Sami Zayn and Samoa Joe simultaneously won a triple threat match to name a new #1 contender when they put submissions on Baron Corbin, he tapped, and the referee was never once like, “the winner is inconclusive so I guess you all have to keep wrestling.” That’s an effort to set up a one-on-one match between Zayn and Joe, which I am totally fine with.

Note: We missed this episode last week, so give this a read and look for the 2/10 edition tomorrow morning.

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And now, the Best and Worst of WWE NXT for February 3, 2016.

Best: The Hype Bros Look Like Ninja Turtles

1. The Vaudevillains as serious characters who maintain the aesthetic, but stop screwing around and beat peoples’ asses is something I’ve been waiting for forever. I’m glad they’re continuing to move in that direction, because if we’re being honest, Aiden English and Simon Gotch are probably the two most underrated and underappreciated people on the NXT roster. Broadway performer Aiden English is one of my favorite seemingly forgotten NXT characters, and Gotch even had that PWG indie street cred, but signed during that nexus period (no pun intended) between when WWE felt obligated to sign indie names, and when they actually wanted to. If anybody deserves to get their sh*t together and blow up somewhere, it’s the Villains.

2. The Hype Bros in that color scheme look like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Their asses look like Michaelangelo’s face. It’s all I can see. Now all I can picture is Michaelangelo barfing up a bunch of pizza and … I should probably stop picturing.

3. The Villains trounce the Hype Bros, and I didn’t have a lot to say about it until I saw the backstage followup. I’ve said this before, but I’m kinda super falling in love with the Mojo Rawley character. First he’s checking up on little kids and hugging them for doing well on their report cards, then he’s making jokes about watching his tag team partner’s back so thoroughly he stares at him when he sleeps, and now he’s turning a negative into a positive and explaining that losing means they’ve finally got competition, and it’s time to get serious.

When did Mojo Rawley become the biggest babyface on the show? All we got for the first year of this guy was “won’t calm down, hits people with his asshole.”

Best/Worst: Running Backslides

Carmella gets an upset victory over an overconfident Emma with a backslide, and the way she does it brings up one of those rare pro graps talking points where I’m not sure how I feel.

The running backslide. You know the one I’m talking about. You hook your opponent, backslide them and kinda run in place with your feet while the ref’s counting. It creates a sense of urgency around the move, and makes it look like a thing that requires forward motion or whatever to maintain it. Part of me loves it, because it’s a great visual. I’ve probably written about loving it before. I write about a lot of things. Part of me doesn’t, though, because it actually makes the move make less sense. If you’re mountain-climbing with your feet like that, your opponent should have a better shot at breaking the hold. If you plant your feet and Downward Facing Dog it, you’ve got the leverage advantage to hold their shoulders to the mat. That’s not a complaint, really, just me thinking too much about how wrestling’s supposed to work.

Carmella gets a little “I can beat a star” momentum without making Emma look too bad, and I spend another six weeks wondering why Big Boss Emma isn’t the one who’s gonna take the NXT Women’s Championship from Bayley. That’s what I’d do with it. Give the strap to Emma, send Bayley up to be a millionaire who grants Make-A-Wish wishes while we worry about how she’s “being used,” and let Emma perish almost immediately at the hands of Asuka. I guess NXT doesn’t really do the “transitional champion” gimmick.

Best: Serious Enzo And Cass

Like the Vaudevillains, Enzo Amore and Colin Cassady as serious (or at least semi-serious) characters is a breath of fresh air. They were always fun but kinda schmucks in the ring, so them realizing they’re getting a reputation for not being able to win the big one and getting real violent and confrontational with everybody is cool. They still aren’t gonna win the big one, though, because American Alpha came out of nowhere to be the best damn thing on the show, so it’s either the distant start of a heel turn, a fun few months before they get brought up to Smackdown to be WWE’s fifth actual tag team, or a rocket launcher into oblivion. I hope it’s the first two. I’m sure it is.

The best part of the match is this, when Inspire Pro Champion slash unnamed Local Talent “Absolute” Ricky Starks gets launched over the top rope to the floor like a bag of potatoes.

That’s crazy. Longtime readers/viewers may remember Starks as that guy who got food-eared by the “bowly” version of Ryback back in 2013. He’ll be an NXT regular one of these days.

Worst: The Rocket Launcher

Oh, before I forget, I think it’s time for Enzo and Cass to come up with a new tag team finish.

I appreciate a good Midnight Express tribute as much as the next guy and maybe it’s just me, but the move never comes off looking right. Enzo jumps too high, maybe, or Cass isn’t quite tall enough, or the timing’s off. It always looks like Cass is just standing there cheerleading while Enzo does a splash. The rest of their “Cass throws Enzo” stuff looks amazing, but yeah, it doesn’t work for me. Maybe get Cass up on the outside of the second rope and ass-palm Enzo into the air or something if you want to keep it.


Worst: Asuka Vs. Santana Garrett Wasn’t At Least 5 Times Longer

This is one of those times where I hope you read what I’m typing instead of just skimming the bold words and assuming.

Asuka has a quick match against Santana Garrett, whom you may remember from a brief run in TNA or from being the women’s champion pretty much everywhere, and it’s GREAT. Santana looks like actual competition for Asuka, something nobody but Emma’s been able to pull off so far in NXT, and hell, even Emma never looked like she really stood much of a chance. They do a bunch of cool stuff and then … it’s over. This is CRIMINALLY short, and while I’ve never been a big hoo-rah type of guy for Santana, if she can go like this in a WWE ring, they should keep her here and let her do it.

Best: Respect

Finally, we get Finn Bálor and Apollo Crews in a non-title rematch to settle the amicable professional score from the match Baron Corbin ruined back in October.

The thing with Apollo Crews is that he’s a brilliant pro wrestler, but there’s not much to his NXT character. They were building something pretty solid with his “born to be a champion” thing, but then when he started actually wrestling they just put that to the side in favor of, “he smiles and you like him.” Those things are true. He DOES smile and we DO like him, but he hasn’t gotten any engaging stories. The whole Tyler Breeze feud was, “Apollo Crews is gonna beat you and he doesn’t really care about it.” The reason I bring this up is because I love Crews taking a loss here, and I believe these losses he’s suddenly taking will help build him into something with legs.

The issue I (slash we) have with Bálor sometimes is that he’s super overpowered, so it becomes “is he gonna win or lose” moreso than “I hope he wins.” It’s why I’m more of a Sami Zayn guy than a Finn Bálor guy, even though Finn is objectively (and subjectively) cool as sh*t. With Sami, you’ve got the built-in drama that he could lose any match. Titus O’Neil could show up and beat him, and has. If he gets a match with Kevin Owens, Owens might just murk him and put him away. If they have a rematch, Owens might just destroy him again. There’s no real superhero moments for him, and that lets an average jerk like me sorta live vicariously through him. I see Apollo Crews or Finn Bálor and they feel like straight-up superheroes. That’s awesome for a WWE career, but in terms of scraping together what’s left of NXT’s grittier, more emotionally evocative storytelling, it’s not always my favorite.

Crews taking a loss here is great, because it allows him to sorta take a step back to square one without really losing anything, and without the pressure of being the “cool new indie guy.” Stepping in as the hot new guy sometimes is rough, because your identity and everyone’s expectations for you are tied so closely to your pre-WWE career. It’s the difference in the Samoa Joe we got at first, and the one we have now. I think Crews is one of the most undeniably, spectacularly talented people in NXT (and maybe WWE, period), so giving him a chance to really make Apollo Crews into something will be awesome.

I also liked the macho-ass storytelling of Finn hitting his finish but feeling like he needs to also hit his rarer, secondary finish as a sign of respect. That’s a subtle way to put a guy over without having to have him kick out of everything. Beautifully done.