Previously on the Best and Worst of WWE NXT: Heavy Machinery continued being the greatest thing in the history of professional wrestling, Killian Dain was informed by the audience that his back needed shaving, and Asuka threw Ember Moon out of the ring and into the trainer’s room.
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And now, the Best and Worst of WWE NXT for May 10, 2017.
Best: None More Black
This week’s episode of NXT begins with yet another Aleister Black squash match, this one against newcomer Cezar Bononi. It lasts all of 90 seconds. Yeah, it’s kind of a bummer that outside of TakeOver: Orlando, all we’ve seen Black do is crush puddin’ guys — he hasn’t even picked up a microphone — but the nice thing about these squash matches is they’ve all been different.
This one put a lot more emphasis on Black’s quickness and dexterity, with him being two steps ahead of all of Bononi’s offense the entire time. Black’s MMA-style flying knee strike looked brutal, and it served as a new setup for Black Mass, instead of the execution-style head raise he’s been using. It definitely feels like Black hasn’t even attempted to move out of first gear yet, but he looks so good in these early matches that I have to assume NXT creative has something good lined up for him post-TakeOver: Chicago. (Right?)
Worst: The Night Of A Thousand Promos
This episode of NXT was 58 minutes long. Roughly 24 minutes of that was actual wrestling. That leaves nearly 60 percent of the episode dedicated to an endless barrage of video packages, vignettes and backstage promos. Here’s a quick rundown:
- A Pete Dunne video package, retooled from the WWE UK Championship Tournament, to promote his upcoming title match against Tyler Bate at TakeOver: Chicago.
- A separate video package for Tyler Bate, retooled from the WWE UK Championship Tournament, to promote his upcoming title match against Pete Dunne at TakeOver: Chicago.
- A second vignette for the Velveteen Dream, giving no further insight to the character besides “purple???”
- A trip to the tattoo parlor with Ruby Riot, who literally says, “Who is Ruby Riot?” — expect a gimmick infringement lawsuit from Roddy Strong. However, it does feature the quality line, “Any time I get hit in that ring, it reminds me I am alive,” which makes Riot tougher than just about everyone in the women’s division, except …
- Nikki Cross, whose attempt at a sit-down interview is creepy and intense and weirdly hilarious. Watching her swat at the boom mic, threaten PAs and menacingly creep toward my TV screen made me uncomfortable in the best possible way. Screw Ember Moon, let Nikki Cross dethrone Asuka.
- Speaking of Ember Moon, we get an update about her condition following last week’s battle royale, which ended when Asuka launched her out of the ring and into the concrete. It looked particularly gnarly, and apparently it actually was — Moon allegedly has a sprained shoulder and has been ruled out of TakeOver: Chicago. I’m not entirely convinced it isn’t a work, though: Her post-injury promo from the trainer’s room is so forced and stilted that the whole thing feels like another chapter in the Ember Moon underdog story, not an actual malady.
- We also got a backstage promo from Drew McIntyre, who was interrupted by Wesley Blake, presumably resulting in a match in the near future.
- We also got a backstage promo Kassius Ohno, who was interrupted by Andrade “Cien” Almas, definitively resulting in a match next week.
- Even Roderick Strong and Hideo Itami get pre-match interviews before they hit the ring for the main event.
Jesus Christ, guys, maybe try, I dunno, booking a fourth match next time? This was overkill to the nth degree.
Best: Demand It Yourself
To add to the night of a thousand promos, #DIY take to the ring to demand another match against Authors Of Pain, but instead, they’re interrupted by the team of Tino Sabbatelli and Riddick Moss. A brawl breaks out, and the next thing you know, we have a sanctioned tag team match.
I’ll state the obvious: Tino and Riddick look good — they’re the kind of tall, muscular, hairless dudes that littered main roster WWE from 2005-2009. It’s actually refreshing in a weird way to see these two stereotypically beautiful pro wrestlers in NXT as it’s not a look we get to see often in the Full Sail Arena. Frankly, it makes me want to boo them even more, but maybe I’m just projecting my insecurities. (BRB, gotta go to the gym and do planks for 30 minutes straight.)
DIY get the win, as expected, but it’s more competitive than probably anyone thought it would be, which made for good TV. It got even better when Commissioner Regal comes out to announce DIY vs Authors Of Pain for the NXT Tag Team Titles at TakeOver: Chicago and is interrupted by AOP and Paul Ellering (appearing on TV for the first time since retaining the belts at TakeOver: Orlando over a month ago). Ellering says they’ll end DIY’s career, promising Regal that “their blood will be on your hands.”
In response, Regal calls his bluff makes the match a ladder match, much to the chagrin of the two big-ass dudes in flak jackets and much to the enjoyment of two tiny, fast guys who are much more apt to scamper up a ladder than trade off power moves. It’s weird this match is being thrown together less than two weeks before TakeOver: Chicago, which leads me to believe there will not be a title change, but #DIY’s string of stellar matches on Network specials makes me stoked to see it nonetheless.
Best: I Coulda Been A Contender
The No. 1 contender match between Hideo Itami and Roddy Strong started off surprisingly slow — given the gravity of the match, I thought they’d be wrestling with a bit more intensity early on. But once they got into the chop fest, it picked up considerably, and the back half of the match was full of awesome spots, like Itami’s Falcon Arrow nearfall, Roddy’s flying knee strike, the double clothesline and my personal favorite, when when Roddy knocks Itami off the apron, catches him then chucks him into the apron. Ouch.
I also appreciate the commentary team actually talking about Itami’s failings for the past two years and drawing attention to his shoulder scar. He hasn’t been a regular part of NXT TV for so long that I’d venture to guess that a good chunk of people watching in 2017 literally know nothing about him. The previous two episodes of NXT showed the work as to why we should cheer for Roddy, thanks to two effective video packages, so props to Nigel, Tom and (I can’t even believe I’m saying this) Percy for doing some verbal heavy lifting to get Hideo over again.
Worst: Shut Up And Watch The F*cking Match Already
Okay. So. I don’t completely hate the “1-2-SWEET!” kickout chant that’s been sweeping WWE arena lately — it’s kinda clever, and it was funny the first few times I heard it. But man, does Full Sail beat this kind of sh*t into the ground. Then during the main event, featuring two guys they supposedly love finally getting their big breaks, the crowd has the gall to double down on their behavior by shooting dueling chants of “THAT’S ANNOYING! / SO ARE YOU!” back and forth, followed by a “WATCH THE MATCH” chant. It made me want to watch the rest of the show with my soundbar muted. For f*ck’s sake, Full Sail: Cheer the guys you wanna cheer, boo the guys you wanna boo, but enough with the meta chants. Grow up already.
Worst: Sorry, Folks, We’re Out Of Time!
Itami finishes Strong off with a pretty good looking GTS, and following the match, the two competitors share an embrace that feels completely earned. Then, NXT goes off the air. But wait! As I scrolled through Twitter, I randomly see a video on NXT’s Twitter account (and WWE’s YouTube page) that Roderick Strong was beaten down by SAnitY for a good two minutes, to set up his next program.
How many people reading this recap even knew this happened? And why in the hell does an episode of NXT with 30-plus minutes of promos, recaps and commercials not make time for one of their main characters’ new storylines? Like, I don’t even care all that much about Roddy Strong, but to omit this is a bizarre and foolish choice, especially after building the guy up like crazy for the past two weeks.
Furthermore: Remember last week, when I remarked that SAnitY could be in for a rough go on the main roster because they can’t even manage a pop at the Full Sail Arena, and then everyone jumped to the comments section to tell me that SAnitY gets “actual heel heat” and blah blah blah? Watch that clip above. If you hear anything besides politely murmured boos, your hearing is apparently better than mine.
Full Sail’s attention span is admittedly pretty short, and they get distracted by something shiny very easily, but I think this actually reveals SAnitY’s biggest weakness: The crowd only cares enough to rally against them if they’re up against a beloved babyface like Tye Dillinger. The faction doesn’t have enough standalone heat at all, and I doubt they’ll earn it against Roddy “I Am A Father, Cheer Me Please” Strong.
Next Week: Kassius Ohno squares off against Andrade “Cien” Almas, plus probably 45 minutes of TakeOver hype promos.
