House of the Dragon’s second episode in season two keeps adding to the show’s body count in the most tragic of ways.
Sure, beheading a child is pretty bad, but forcing two incredibly attractive twin brothers to kill each other so that Criston Cole can feel better about his affair with Alicent? That’s crossing a line. While the Greens plot their revenge for the Blood & Cheese assassination, Rhaenyra questions who amongst her council she can truly trust. The cracks are showing at Dragonstone, and old alliances are imploding within the Red Keep. Luckily, we’re of the Marie Kondo mindset: we love mess.
Here are the biggest takeaways from House of the Dragon’s second episode.
The Fallout From Blood & Cheese
Aegon reacts to the news of his son’s beheading in the only way that befits a neglected manchild with a superiority complex: he smashes his dead daddy’s Lego set to bits. While he declares war, his mother and grandfather plot how to use this tragedy to their advantage. Sure, Alicent is quietly blaming herself for keeping a Kingsguard so busy in her bedchamber that two assassins had enough time to tour the royal residence before decapitating her grandson, but she’s also quick to back Otto’s plan of using the murder to advance the Greens’ cause. Otto’s also smart enough to see Jaehaerys’ death for what it is: a gift, one that will sway more Houses to his side if he can put the right spin on it. So, a very public grief parade is planned and unfortunately for Helaena, she’s riding behind its main float.
The Funeral Procession
House of the Dragon has never shied away from uncomfortable scenes. We’ve been asked to root for incest, to gaze on as a man literally decayed before our eyes, to watch Criston Cole exhibit loser behavior in every episode, but somehow, this week’s funeral procession dialed up the cringe. We blame the poor stitching on Jaehaerys’ corpse and Phia Saban, whose ability to play a woman who exists between worlds – the dreaming and the real – is just unmatched. The moments of lucidity Saban gifts Helaena in this episode, first when she refuses to participate in her husband’s charade, then as the wagon gets stuck on the streets of King’s Landing and the crowds begin to press in, make her anguish almost visceral. It’s hard not to squirm watching as she braves throngs of smallfolk, all clamoring to touch her while crying and calling her name as her dead child sits mere feet in front of her – his murder touted as the vile works of her sister in order to justify even more death.
Daemon’s Confession At Dragonstone
While the Hightowers reap the benefits of Daemon’s incompetence, on Dragonstone, Rhaenyra is left to clean up her king consort’s mess. Her allies, her council, hell, her own family, question whether she was behind the plot to kill Jaehaerys – a claim she’s quick to deny. And yes, Rhaenyra should take more responsibility for the vengeance Daemon wrought in her name, but who can blame her for losing her cool when her uncle-husband is over here smirking every time the phrase “a child is dead” is uttered? If “contrite” is really a word, Daemon Targaryen’s never heard of it. The bungle hit job at the Red Keep drives a wedge between the couple, causing some long-buried doubts to come rising to the surface. Rhaenyra admits she can’t trust Daemon. Daemon admits he still covets her throne. It’s the messiest breakup we’ve seen on the show so far, and it couldn’t come at a worse time. Daemon blows off some steam by flying his dragon to Harrenhaal while the show makes good use of Emma D’Arcy’s impeccable jawline via some closeups meant to show us how sad and alone this whole “rightful heir” life really is.
Criston Cole Becomes Hand Of The King
Westeros would be a much better place if Criston Cole’s parents had used a condom. Unfortunately for all of us, this pathetic, grasping cockroach just can’t seem to die. Not when he shirks his duties to bang the dowager queen, not when he literally kills a man at a royal wedding, and not even when he plots a war behind Otto Hightower’s back. Guilt and shame are riding Westeros’ number one incel hard so he takes it upon himself to send his sole remaining Cargyll twin to Dragonstone in the hopes he can impersonate his brother long enough to kill Rhaenyra in her sleep. Naturally this kind of ruthless initiative really speaks to a bloodthirsty Aegon and after yet another row with his gramps, the king makes Cole his Hand and gives Otto Hightower the boot. This is a decision we expect all involved will soon regret.
The Battle Of The Twins
Yet again, House of the Dragon season two ends an episode with a foiled murder plot though somehow, this one feels even more tragic than a child’s head getting sawed off in its sleep. Arryk, commanded by Cole, passes through the gates of Dragonstone, making it all the way to Rhaenyra’s chambers before his brother, Erryk challenges him. Mysaria was smart enough to recognize the latter’s twin while on her way to the docks, effectively saving the queen’s life. The brothers bash about the room a bit, each reluctant to hurt the other, until Erryk finally kills Arryk, then commits suicide. It’s all very bleak and terribly sad and just another reason why Criston Cole is the worst character George R.R. Martin has ever written.
That’s all for this week. Check back for our thoughts on next week’s episode!
New ‘House of the Dragon’ episodes air on HBO (and stream on Max) on Sunday nights.
