Bill Goldberg Adopted A Pet Goat And Gave It The Best Possible Name

Move over, Jose Canseco. A more sane and less hilariously inept former professional athlete has adopted a goat as a pet, and that man is former NFL player and WCW and WWE star Bill Goldberg. The Garage Mahal host proudly Tweeted on Friday that he had become a new pet daddy again, as he had apparently taken a small goat into his home. But the best part of any news involving someone’s new pet is the name, because people can only go one of two ways in naming a pet – awesome or really stupid. Goldberg chose the former and named his new adorable furry friend Goatberg.

Really relevant personal anecdote: A friend of mine bought a pygmy goat a few years ago because he has a drinking problem and often has ideas that he thinks are great but end up being terrible, and we convinced him to name it Goatse. It lasted four whole days before someone told him to Google “Goatse.”

Naturally, where there’s celebrity goat news, there’s TMZ, and things haven’t been all roses and tiny poop pellets for Goldberg and his wife.

Goatberg has issues. He’s peed all over the floor and munched on ritz crackers … without invitation. Short story … the goat’s a terror, but the Goldberg’s couldn’t be more in love.

Bill Goldberg tells TMZ … his wife is a huge animal lover and when he found out her horse trainer was trying to unload the goat — he took it off the guys hands.

TMZ should adopt a goat and name it Unnecessary … Ellipses. Seriously, it would be adorable.