Heads Up, TNA Impact Wrestling Is Now Available For Sale Or Trade On Craigslist

07.30.14 5 years ago 13 Comments

Ever wanted to own your own wrestling company? Think you know how to properly utilize the boys in the back? Is now my chance to rebuild a company from the ground up based on the principles of friendship and also more friendship? According to this Craigslist ad, now’s our chance:

For Sale or Trade!

One slightly used wrestling company!

Great for kids birthday parties, local armories, or aaa baseball fields!

I am selling my Daddies wrestling company!11! Tee hee!

It’s Call Total Non, No wait it’s called TNA Wre, no maybe we settled on Impact Wrestling. You know what I’m not too sure but I do know we have Hulk, I mean Sting, I mean AJ St… We have Robbie E.

We currently have a national TV deal but I’m not sure how long that’s going to last. To be honest I’m surprised it lasted this long! But you could always do weekly PPV’s, that work GREAT for us!

Anyway you can contact me to purchase the entire company or I’d be willing to sell my guys individually. If you want Kurt Angle to wrestle at your wedding, no problem! Just buy or trade him out from me!

We have two rings because we never could decide what we wanted to do, and even when we did we were never decisive enough to stick with those decisions.

Contrary to the rumors Vince Russo is not working for us! That was all a swerve that we did just to work the sheets. We got tired of them constantly saying that we sucked and posting photoshopped photos of our HUGE events with no crowds and only empty seats.

Anyway I feel like I’m not doing anything now but just wasting valuable space in this ad and if you know anything about me, you know I’d never waste anything, be it time or money.

So if you are a money mark and in the market for buying yourself respect in the business and want to help raise your stock so you can be friends with the boys, this deal is for you!

And don’t forget, it’s also a GREAT tax write off!

Better start doing those chest presses, Samoa Joe, ‘cuz you’re gonna do so much hugging.

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