Let’s Watch A Pro Wrestler Win A Test Of Strength Using His Penis

This isn’t news, but … uh, I thought you should see it.

What you’re witnessing is, essentially, a test of strength between U.S. independent wrestling star Joey Ryan and Japan’s Danshoku Dino. Ryan is known for being “sleazy,” being one half of a team called “The World’s Cutest Tag Team” and putting used blow pops in the mouths of fans before matches. Dino is an overt sexual predator (for comedy) who routinely teabags his opponents and puts their heads down the front of his trunks before he piledrives them. If that doesn’t make you laugh, please, do not YouTube search for Danshoku Dino.

Anyway, what I’m getting at is that they’re more or less soulmates, and Dino dared to engage in a test of strength with Joey’s junk. What happens next can only happen in the world of pro wrestling, unless this country’s sexual education has grossly undereducated me on the intangible capabilities of penises. I would not only recommend watching, enjoying and sharing this clip, but also showing it at the dinner table at your next family get-together. We just missed Thanksgiving, so maybe Christmas. Your grandparents need to know about this wonderful and horrifyingly weird thing you’ve chosen to love.

If you ask me, I prefer the classic, wholesome WWE version of the test of strength.