The internet is filled with questions about celebrities that will never be answered. Luckily, John Cena has just stepped up to do his part and answer some of those burning, lingering questions about John Cena that fans have tossed into the ether. The sixteen-time champ went “undercover” on a slew of websites, courtesy of GQ.
Let me just say, however, that this is the worst instance of going “undercover” of all time, because his username on all these sites was “ActuallyJohnCena.” You’re not fooling anyone, tough guy. The end result was pretty wonderful, and don’t worry: he answered plenty of questions about his jorts. And whether he’s in the Illuminati. And what his favorite anime is.
I greatly appreciate the thoroughness of the websites he visited. I definitely never would have thought of Quora. Also, this may be the first recorded instance of a definitive answer being given on Yahoo! Answers.
No idea how most of these sites and responses reacted to John Cena ACTUALLY answering their questions, but at least over on Reddit, everyone is completely thrilled. There’s even a thread requesting that he be given mod powers. I think this is a solid idea. Cena already rules the rest of the world, so why not let him control the internet, too?