Previously on the Over/Under of Lucha Underground: Oh my God, it was so long ago. I was going to do a full season 3 catch-up, but this episode is only one “All Night Long” match, so here’s the short version: Drago’s being held captive by a reptile tribe, Sexy Star won the Lucha Underground Championship only to immediately lose it to dickbag Johnny Mundo, Marty the Moth has been kidnapped by his own sister and Rey Mysterio Jr. may have manslaughtered Matanza. Oh, and the Mack has a title shot, which we set up just before we took a six month mid-season break.
If you need to catch up on the rest of the episodes — if you aren’t caught up, you should need to catch up — you can read about season 1 here, and season 2 here. Season 3 episode recaps can be found here.
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And now, the Over/Under on Lucha Underground season 3, episode 20, originally aired on May 30, 2017.
Hey where are you going, we just started.
Only Two “Unders” This Week
1. The first is that guy, who gets up to go take a leak after the first pinfall in Johnny Mundo vs. The Mack All Night Long. It’s not his fault he gets up, I just found it hilarious that with a six month break, El Rey Network and Lucha Underground specifically did a pan-out to the crowd after the first fall to capture this guy (and only this guy) leaving his seat. DOWN IN FRONT, PAL.
2. It’s a very minor complaint, I guess, but the show doesn’t acknowledge the mid-season break. In fact, when Striker is explaining how we got the All Night Long stipulation, he says, “Two weeks ago, Mundo had what I called a ‘cheap win!'” So if the first half of the season was supposed to be happening week-to-week in real time, was all this stuff in January? I know it was taped way before that, but in my brain — and maybe only in my brain — the “two weeks later” bit kinda makes me feel like I’m watching Nitro on the Network or something.
I really had to stretch for something “Under,” right? So let’s get to the good stuff.
Over: Everything Else Is The Good Stuff
After 2 1/2 seasons of losing his decency, losing his mind and gaining a pack of entitled Caucasian shit-lords, Johnny Mundo née Morrison is the Lucha Underground Champion. He won it via the Gift of the Gods and having Taya cosplay as a Sexy Star fan to get the jump on her through COURTEOUS EMPATHY and bash her in the face with brass knucks. He’s the worst person in the world. Sexy’s friend The Mack earned the next title shot, and Mundo (through cheating, again) earned the right to pick the stipulation. He picked “All Night Long” — Lucha Underground’s answer to an iron man match — because he’s Boone the damn Bounty Hunter and The Mack looks like Ron Funches got confused and left his house in some purple underwear.
The story of the first fall is, as it should be, Mundo using his athletic excellence to top Mack. In a straight one-on-one wrestling match, he should be able to out-maneuver Mack, not because of their physical appearance, but because the entire point of his existence is PARKOUR GUY. He lures the Mack to the top rope, hangs off the outside of the ring post like an idiot until the Mack is confused, trips Mack up through the ropes and hits the End of the World. It’s 1-0 early, and that lends to the overconfidence that will eventually have Mundo doing everything in the rudo playbook to escape with his belt.
Mundo’s second quick win is a little less confident: a roll-up while grabbing the ropes for leverage. The second referee present didn’t see that, because reasons. So without Mack even really doing anything, the story Mundo’s telling is that the longer the match goes, the less focused he’ll be on winning straight-up, which is actually a detriment to his entire plan. He could probably just out-wrestle Mack for an hour, but he’s gotta be a mental child about it.
A little bit after the second fall, Mundo does a relatively subtle thing where he sells a severe neck injury, crawling away from Mack like he needs medical help. The announcers note that it shows you the effects of an All Night Long match. It turns out to be a ruse, though, as Mundo was just doing it to lure Mack in. This becomes important in a sec.
The plan doesn’t really accomplish much, and Mack’s able to counter a springboard crossbody into a powerbomb (somehow) to bring the score to 2-1. After this, Mundo takes the cowardly plan that worked — the faux injury — and escalates it.
Mundo does one of his big corkscrew spinning parkour somethings onto Mack, then instantly grabs his leg like he’s injured. He keeps the ruse going this time, until the ring is full of referees and EMTs separating them and trying to take him away on a spine board. Mundo recovers, of course, kipping up at the last possible second to get the jump on Mack and DDT him into the spine board to make the match 3-1.
Good and evil in Lucha Underground works on a sort of unspoken karma system, so Mundo pays for this dirty plan by getting his ass beaten around the arena, being strapped to the board and slid down the arena steps.
When they get to the bottom, Mack flips him over so he splats face-down on the Temple floor, rolls him back into the ring, Stone Coldly stunners him to death and makes the match 3-2. Somehow, this is where the crazy stuff begins.
Mundo crawls under the ring and out the other side, and apparently escapes down the dramatically lit hallway alongside Dario’s office. Mack chases him out into … the parking lot? I think I remember the geography of that place. But whoops, it turns out Johnny Mundo was actually still under the ring, and Mack had been chasing Worldwide Underground crony PJ Black in disguise. When they run back in, Benny Hill style, Mundo and Black beat him down with kendo sticks. And not even ones they pulled down from a pole!
The good news for The Mack is that Lucha Underground tecnicos are not usually super stupid, so once a rudo interferes (and shows the match is no disqualification), one of Mack’s previously observed friends runs out to help him. Out first is Son of Havoc, brandishing two kendo sticks of havoc and wreaks HAVOC OF HAVOC on the heels. When it’s time to revive Mack, he knocks on Dario Cueto’s door and demands a beer. Because on this show even the owner’s office having a supply of beer available inside it has been clearly established. Dario’s response is hilarious, as per usual.
The little peek back out at the end makes it. I swear, that guy’s the best actor in the world.
Anyway, beer revives The Mack like spinach empowers Popeye, so he pops up, beats up Mundo and Black with sticks himself and starts setting up tables. It’s going well for him for a while, but the rudos actually regain the advantage for a bit, so much so that they head over to the entrance aisle under the house band and demand they play Worldwide Underground a “victory song.”
And then, because on this show even house bands wearing luchador masks not being an uncommon thing has been established, Sexy Star’s able to disguise herself as a nondescript luchadora de maracas and dives onto them. It’s GREAT.
Quick shout-out to, “I didn’t know Sexy Star knew how to play maracas!” That’s one of the funniest calls of the year.
With the damned numbers game on his side, Mack is finally able to completely recover and take out Mundo with a goddamn Greetings From Asbury Park through some tables to even things up at 3-3.
As the minutes tick down, Sexy Star and Son of Havoc stay at ringside to make sure nobody else interferes. A ladder comes into play, and it’s put-up or shut-up time for Mundo … and, as you might’ve guessed, he’s unable to put up, because he just doesn’t remember how to do it. He’s been wrestling a coward’s match for the past 30 minutes, with Twin Magic and kendo sticks and victory celebrations, when he could’ve just been outlasting this admittedly impressive specimen of a fat guy.
A ladder gets involved, and the finish looks like it’s going to be a something off a ladder through a table to give Mack the win and the Championship. He’s drained, though, and takes forever to climb. He ain’t got that Mundo spring, because Mundo was right and picked the right stipulation, he was just a dick about it. Out of nowhere pops Lucha Underground’s lowest ranking guy but Johnny Mundo’s #1 fan RICKY MANDEL, dressed like Mundo, to grab Mack’s leg. Not sure why they had the guy who looks exactly like Mundo do the leg grabbing and dressed up PJ Black as Mundo earlier, but sure, whatever! He gets dispatched pretty quickly, because he’s Ricky Mandel, but the delay allows Mundo to survive the clock and one of the most beautiful big man frog splashes you’ll ever see:
Mack gets the Greensboro Coliseum one-two-ding-ding-time-ran-out-before-the-ref-could-count-three pulled on him, and Mundo retains. However, because this is the best wrestling show in the world and everybody’s trying to make it good, Dario Cueto pops out of his office to announce that there are NO TIES IN HIS TEMPLE, and that next week we’re restarting the match under sudden death rules. And there’s no time limit, so there’s a chance the match could go all night long again.
Mack ends the show by hitting a stunner on Mundo and celebrating with the belt, which might as well stamp MACK IS NOT WINNING NEXT WEEK on his forehead. I haven’t been spoiled on the rest of this season yet, but by my count Mundo’s got another doppelganger at his disposal now and two people in his faction we didn’t even see on this episode.
Oh, I thought of one more “Under.”
Under: How You Gonna Take Six Months Off And Not Catch Us Up On All The Stories?
I know you built up to this All Night Long match and then took a break so you’ve got to lead with it, but man, I want to know what’s happening with everybody else, too. I was hoping they’d give us some cool backstage story stuff before the match or maybe after the credits, but nope, nothing. No Brian Cage power glove, no evil Lorenzo Lamas, no update on the undercover cop posing as a spider-themed luchador, none of it. And what happens if next week is All Night Long as well? We just gonna wait forever?
Over: But Seriously, I Am So Glad This Is Back
Just put the rest of the season on Netflix tomorrow and let me binge it, okay guys?