There were two big stories out of last night’s RAW: 1) OHHHH SNAP KATIE VICK REFERENCE and 2) What the hell is up with John Cena’s eye?
Sure, there are plenty of “haha Nikki’s a whore” jokes that people have been making because that’s the peak of complex joke-making and hilarity. And I’d love to pile on with jokes about how her vagina gave him pink eye or something that won’t get me stuffed in a locker before lunch. But here’s the actual deal, according to the WWE’s totally not fake doctor:
“John Cena had been [competing during] last weekend’s Live Events when he sustained a corneal abrasion during his Live Event matches. This evening during the attack by Rusev, John Cena’s injuries were exacerbated. As mentioned [on commentary], those injuries were a scratched cornea and a ruptured blood vessel. We’re going to do periodic eye exams to make sure the scratch on his cornea is healing and he will be ready for WWE Fastlane.“
Apparently it’s a legit injury that he’s using to play into the Rusev story. Most importantly, does Hulk Hogan approve?
Of course he does. So, nothing to worry about, kids. On to Fast Lane!
