Previously on The Best and Worst of Raw: WWE World Heavyweight Champion Seth Rollins took a break from losing matches to discover that his frienemy Kane has gone from “mild-mannered Director of Operations who sometimes becomes a demon” to “extremely mild-mannered Director of Operations AND a demon.” He’s both, and he switches between them without warning.
In other developments, Kalisto discovered that his tag-team partner is both a wrestler AND a terrible wrestler, which he should’ve figured out by now. Natalya’s back, Cesaro’s career is D-grade horse meat and the Divas Revolution is officially about how jealous everyone is about who everyone else is f*cking.
Please enjoy the Best and Worst of WWE Raw for Sept. 28, 2015.
Worst: John Cena Telling People There’s A Time To Entertain And A Time To Be Serious, Or
Best: HE CUSSED! THAT’S SCARY!
Here’s something you haven’t read in a Best and Worst column yet: The New Day was the best part of the show.
This week’s highlights included (1) Xavier Woods answering John Cena’s U.S. open challenge by playing ‘The Time Is Now’ on trombone, (2) a “new U.S. Champ” Cena theme remix, (3) comparisons to and clarifications from Scrooge McDuck and his Money Bin, and (4) Big E selling Cena’s SERIOUS BUSINESS JACK tone with “oh, he cussed! He cussed! That’s scary!” As always, The New Day doesn’t show up doing one thing to make us laugh; they do half a dozen things, and we spend the six days between Raws ranking which ones we liked the most. Kofi Kingston yelling about how we thought they couldn’t swim is probably this week’s #1.
The lowlight has to be Cena himself, McMahonsplaining to The New Day that, “there’s a time to entertain, and a time to be serious.” This is John Cena we’re talking about, the guy who has responded to every serious thing that’s ever happened with a jovial, “WE’RE HOT IN WHATEVER CITY WE’RE IN TONIGHT” tone and wacky jokes. Sometimes he prepares photoshops. Don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of Cena as an elitist veteran who thinks wrestling should be serious business and lariats dudes to start matches, but it comes across as less “tough champion” and more “do as I say, not as I do.” Cena’s weird code of honor and behavior only exists situationally, and from his perspective.
The actual match that followed was disappointing, but that’s to be expected. It wasn’t a showcase title defense, it was a building block to a bigger story, which I actually enjoyed quite a bit: