It’s almost Christmas, and that means festive good cheer is being offered by all your favorite brands, and WWE is no exception. This year, they’ve released a Happy Holidays video in the form of a storybook, complete with a warm narrator and colorful cartoon drawings of a whole bunch WWE Superstars. It’s premised on the bizarre idea is that a fleet of miniature wrestlers are hiding in houses and spying on children to make sure they’re being good for the holidays. Basically it’s Elf on a Shelf, but the elves are much more muscular and a lot of them don’t wear pants.
The video’s full of images that will stick with you. Finn Bálor watches approvingly as a boy brushes his teeth, but the pan to reveal a glimpse of the Demon is like something out of a horror story. The New Day dressed up as pancakes is a natural choice, but Braun Strowman as a syrup bottle is much more out of left field. And then there’s soggy Daniel Bryan in the cereal bowl, presumably upset because they used real milk from an innocent cow.
One of the strangest things about the video is how it seems unstuck in time. It’s one thing to include Roman Reigns, but referring to John Cena as “the champ” certainly feels dated, and there are more minor details like long-haired Rusev, mutton-chop Sheamus, and steampunk Becky Lynch. But on the other hand, Ronda Rousey and Rey Mysterio are both there, so it was definitely produced recently. But at this point I’m intensely overthinking things, so you should ignore me and enjoy this silly video instead.