Watch John Cena And His Giant Arms Fumble With Food On His New Cooking Show

Man, imagine the John Cena jokez if anyone other than John Cena was doing this. 

John Cena is a huge superstar. Whether you LOVE ‘IM OR HATE ‘IM, every minor thing Cena does attracts a huge amount of attention, with one exception: Did you know that John Cena has a cooking show? Neither WWE or Cena himself ever promoted it, but Cena is spokesman for the BodyChange weight loss system, and as part of that, Cena is now hitting YouTube to whip up healthy, easy-to-make meals like a giant, veiny Rachael Ray.

You’d think the sight of John Cena in an apron, chopping veggies like he’s never seen a knife or food other than a chicken breast before would be a viral sensation, but his current cooking video only has around 250 views. So, let’s try to make the one part of John Cena’s life that isn’t a wild success a little more popular, shall we?

Here’s our boy John “cooking” up a ham and avocado platter, AKA a bunch of deli ham and avocado just sitting in a pile on a plate. It takes him seven minutes to teach us how to do this, largely because John seems to be terrified that he’s going to break the food with his T-800 arms…

Nikki Bella, your special Valentine’s Day dinner is ready.

Did you AA that food onto the plate, John?

While we’re at it, here’s Cena describing the new Cenation-approved four food groups and the magical weight loss powers of LIMES!

I really never expected that I’d have to type these words one day, but I think Cena could take some tips from Gene Snitsky.