Hey, fellow fans of both death and pro graps, it’s time for another installment of Wrestling with Death. The official WWD twitter feed seems to have abandoned the GIFs, so you’re getting a lot of text since I’m pretty much the only person that continues to watch this show.
EPISODE FIVE
– Jimmy is the newest body, and he’s a large man, which will make things difficult.
– Sandra wants to become co-commissioner of MCW with LaFonce, saying she’s got a lot of great ideas and wants to help out. LaFonce thinks it should be kept to one person running things, him.
– Sandra wants more female wrestlers in MCW, which LaFonce agrees to, saying they are good draws. He even wants some female tag teams, but says there aren’t a lot of women that get into wrestling (UHHHH)
– Harry wants to go into the woods to rough it with Max and Derrick. Derrick, predictably, is not down with this idea at all. Max brings a frog he caught to the dinner table and Derrick panics. Max is looking forward to creeping out Derrick in tandem with Harry because “Derrick is a diva.”
– Sandra calls Kelley, The Cajun Lady, to try and get her back in the ring. Unfortunately, Kelley is unavailable, so Sandra has to scramble to find a replacement since next week’s show is already advertising a women’s match.
– In the woods, Derrick is called a diva again and gets freaked out by bugs.
– Jerry, LaFonce, and Bubby struggle to get Jimmy into the casket, but they’ve “never dropped a body, and I don’t want this to be the first”. Jimmy is successfully deposited into the coffin, which is good for everyone.
– The camping group is at a fishing hole, and Derrick wonders “what the Indians did”. Harry corrects him, saying “You mean Native Americans. That’s pretty insensitive of you” and I think my brain just exploded. Derrick wants Harry to catch a lobster, and Max chimes in “They live in salt water, learn your animal facts”.
– Sandra brings in some women from Illinois, and I don’t think they’ve been spending time at the Berwyn Eagles Club. LaFonce adds that if wrestlers are good, you’ve probably heard or read about them, neither of which can be said about these two.
– Sandra said she isn’t looking for T&A, she wants women who can hold their own in the ring and who can wrestle her. The two from Illinois don’t really show much promise, and don’t appear to be as trained as expected. LaFonce says they aren’t up to MCW standard, which isn’t something I knew existed.
– The night of the show and Ms. Sandra takes on one of the Illinois ladies. She basically trucks the girl, finishing her off with Ms. Sandra’s sidewalk slam. LaFonce seems pleased, saying he wants more ladies matches and says Sandra can be co-commissioner.
EPISODE SIX
– Harry is showing Max how to bump, preparing his son to join the family business. The age limit is 16, so Max has six years before he can officially enter the MCW ring.
– At the funeral home, Tonya, the office manager, is not good at dealing with customers. She gets short with people on the phone and in person.
– At a mani/pedi session with Sandra and Max, Derrick (Who is a diva for enjoying manicures and pedicures) reveals he’s started his own promotion, Live All-Star Wrestling, about an hour away. As long as it doesn’t interfere with MCW, LaFonce is fine with it. Derrick, the top babyface in LAW, is going for the title and suggests Sandra show up and turn heel.
– Tonya asks for a raise from LaFonce, but she has to bring in more business to justify a pay increase. The idea is to hold an open house for pre-arranged funerals that Tonya will run.
– In an attempt to prepare her for the open house, Tonya goes to a customer service class and fails miserably at it.
– Derrick gets Sandra in the ring to show her the ropes of effective heeling. Sandra tries to insult the crowd, but just ends up corpsing each time. LaFonce walks in on the situation, and due to his “Lathams Don’t Heel” policy, tells Derrick and company to clear out of the ring.
– It’s open house time, and Tonya is super nervous about talking to people. Eventually she gets some people to buy pre-arranged funerals, so she’s getting a raise.
– LaFonce still doesn’t want Sandra to turn heel, but Sandra says she’s never no-showed, and she won’t start now.
– The main event is Derrick King challenging for Dustin Star’s world title, and just as Derrick looks to be close to winning the belt, Sandra nails him with a low blow. The crowd goes nuts and a few fans even attempt to attack Sandra and Dustin.
– After the match, Sandra decides that being a heel isn’t for her, but hey, at least she tried!
Come back next week for more of knockoff Shelton Benjamin getting called a diva.
