Pre-show notes: You can watch this week’s episode here. All of our NXT content can be found here, from the previous Best and Worst reports to breaking news and highlights.
With Spandex is on Twitter, so follow it. Follow us on Twitter and like us on Facebook. You can also follow me on Twitter. We need your support for the shows between live specials when too few of the casual fans are watching, so consider clicking one of the share buttons you see throughout. They look like this:
And now, the Best and Worst of WWE NXT for September 9, 2015.
Worst: Nobody Gets To Say ‘Poop’ Ever Again
This week, we start the show with Bull Dempsey challenging Tyler Breeze to a match, and take the scenic route through the garbage graveyard that is Adam Rose’s career. If you haven’t seen it yet, Adam Rose is a “party pooper.” If you’re wondering what a party-pooping gimmick entails, so far it’s:
1. wear glasses
2. say “poop” a lot
That’s it. Breeze and Rose are supposed to wrestle, so Rose cuts a pre-match promo. “I’m not going to party anymore! I’m a party POOPER! I’m going to POOP on your party, because you POOPED on mine! Tyler Breeze, I will also POOP on your party, because all parties need POOP!” It’s like a third grader with a book of Mad Libs wrote it. It’s literally nothing, and all I can think is how much more effective this would be if they’d let him say “shit.” They own the Network, right? Just surprise people. Do it like that South Park episode. Adam Rose shows up all, “I’m the PARTY SHITTER. I’m gonna SHIT ON YOUR PARTY. Bull Dempsey, I think you’re SHITTY. I’m gonna SHIT ON YOUR FACE.” We’d gasp so hard it’d cause a nationwide asthma attack, and “party shitter” would be trending for a month. ESPN would have stories about it.
Anyway, this is super terrible. It felt like the first draft of something they wouldn’t even show on Raw. Like, the brains behind Santino’s birthday barbecue and the Twisted Tea Party would’ve watched this and went, “can we lose the poop guy?”
Another thing that bugs me is that they’re sticking with “Bull-Fit.” All it’s really doing is giving the crowd something asinine to chant during his matches. They don’t care about him, they just have a cue to hit. Besides, if you watched the initial vignettes, Bull decided “Bull-Fit” was an embarrassing joke, and that the only way he’d ever get in shape and be respected is to cut the crap and put in the work. So what, now he’s just Bull-Fit again? Did he give up? Is that why he’s exactly the same? I’m onto you, Bull.
Worst: Like We Weren’t Going To Catch This
Backstage, Tyler Breeze is recording a selfie response to Bull Dempsey’s challenge. The only problem is that his phone is on photo mode. You can’t hear me, but I’m making that noise the crowd made when Eva Marie forgot to kick out.
The only explanation, I guess, is that he hadn’t yet set up the camera for the promo, and just left it like that because he knew the guy behind him was filming it and it’d be fine. There’s probably not a way to organically work that explanation into a backstage segment next week, huh?
Best, For Now: TEN TEN TEN TEN
I love Perfect 10 Tye Dillinger. Just wanted to reiterate that. His gimmick is that he thinks he’s a 10, so he has to say “10” a bunch and put 10s on things. It doesn’t have any legs, and that’s what’s precious about it.
I’ve also seen a few of these gimmicks come and go in NXT — Adam Rose’s Rosebuds were the greatest thing we’d ever seen the first few times we saw them — so I don’t want “10” to be all there ever is. Tyler Breeze works so well because his character continues to evolve in tiny ways, whether it’s adding a selfie stick or a fancy entrance or getting broader character motivations, like “I feel left out and want to prove myself.” If Dillinger gets that, Perfect 10 can be something special. If he doesn’t, he’s wearing a shirt that says BULLFIT and having people yell BULLFIT at him, you know?
He also might need a new finish. Can we give him something 10-related? I know a 10-punch in the corner isn’t a finish, but it isn’t much worse than pulling down two separate kneepads and Codebreakering a guy’s cheek with your shin.
BEST: ASUKA
YESSS.
I for-real have no idea how KANA is going to fit into the NXT Women’s Division, but I’m excited for the social experiment that happens when she tries. If the next class of female signees are all in the KANA/Athena vein, then sure, we’ve got a stew going. If we ended up with these hard-kicking, submission-based Super Workers on one side and your Eva Maries and Dana Brookes on the other, we’re in danger of creating that awkward Raw Divas vibe on a show that’s never had it. Don’t get me wrong, I think a Fire Pro scenario where you’ve got wrestlers of all different styles and origins going at it and having competitive matches is AWESOME (x 100), I just don’t want that “meet in the middle” thing that’s been happening with the Divas Revolution to happen here. Let’s go in one direction or the other, or mix them up in a way that makes everyone look good, and doesn’t dumb down OR put anyone in over their head.
It’ll take some time to warm up to “Asuka,” but at least she’s got the anime sword slash/sliding upper and lower halves thing for her logo. Every entrance is a chance for a LEGEND OF KAGE joke!
Best: Shake It Up
+1 to the announce team for saying “shake it up” as many times as possible during Apollo Crews’ entrance, even if they didn’t realize what they were doing.
Apollo Crews is really good. You probably needed to read me say that before you could form the opinion, right? No, Apollo Crews is legit as hell, and one of those guys it’s hard to even buy getting beaten up. The “he’s what happened when Bobby Lashley ate Neville and gained his powers” joke is one thing, but he wrestles like that. The match here with Solomon Crowe is very good — all the matches on this episode are full of high-quality wrestling, which is sometimes missing from the character-heavy NXT shows — and actually kinda salvaged me on Crowe. There’s nobody in the company more in need of a character makeover. Give him a new look, a new name and let him be a heel that has good matches. If he has to be enhancement for a while before something sticks, do it. Don’t do the CJ Parker thing where you let him drift in the wind for a decade, then stumble on something that works seconds before he’s gone. That’s also known as “pulling an Eve Torres.” Colloquially known as the “Batista Goodbye.”
My only complaint about Crews is that his finish is kinda rank. The gorilla press is good, but why does it make his opponents bounce into place for the splash? They land on their stomachs, then rotate in place so they’re on their backs. It’s like something they’d animate into a video game to save time on transitions. Could Crews maybe give them a little push so they rotate on the way down? Even Warrior just splashed their backs and rolled them forward for the pin. I dunno.
Best: Baron Corbin Vs. The Indies
I’ve been going back and forth on this match since I watched it.
On one hand, it’s Baron Corbin and Rhyno vs. two guys I was never a huge fan of on the independents. Johnny Gargano is trying way too hard here, going for absolutely everything he can as quickly as possible and not really remembering to sell anything or tell a story. Ciampa is fine, but he’s not doing anything to stand out. They’re just placeholder guys, you know? They give them a backstage promo to address them “shocking the world” last week — getting a pin on Bull Dempsey isn’t exactly The Kid pinning Razor Ramon, but sure — and it’s … fine. It’s all just fine. They say the things WWE would script anybody to say. “We’re here to make an impression!” “We worked hard to get here!” That kind of stuff. It works, but it’s also hella interchangeable.
On the other hand, the match is different from what we normally get on NXT, and that’s welcome. This is going to sound like more of a compliment than I probably mean, but it reminded me of a Lucha Underground match, where the constant DOING SOMETHING of it all adds to the story of the match. Gargano and Ciampa are in there against two Unstoppable Forces that aren’t taking them seriously, and if they let up for a second, they’re toast. That’s compelling. Corbin and Rhyno not really knowing what to do with Gargano’s incessant offense did pretty well for them, too, even if he eventually jogged into an End of Days and took the loss.
I think I liked it. It was different. If you’re building a tag tournament, you don’t want all the matches to be the same, right? The Lucha Dragons match from last week was better, but this is the one I’m going to think about a few months from now. For better or worse, that’s a thing.
Best: Remix
Dana Brooke turned her Devin Taylor head-pat into a DJ set.
I don’t even want Devin to get mad and Fujiwara armbar her anymore, I want a full-on monster claw where Dana loses an arm.
Best: It’s Bayley
1. Bayley doing a victory lap around Full Sail, bringing Izzy into the ring and coaching her through some pre-match posing was basically everything right about NXT, and pro wrestling. I want to know what Bayley said to her in the ring, but I also kinda don’t, because it wasn’t for me. Them tapping belts and poking at their headbands was wonderful. I hope Izzy goes into wrestling when she gets older, so we can have a Bayley vs. Izzy video package with the greatest possible footage.
2. I liked the Sarah Dobson match, because it showed that just because Bayley’s the champion now, it doesn’t make her invincible. Dobson was game and took the fight to her, and while yeah, Bayley’s out of her league, there’s still a reality that on any given night, anyone can beat anyone. Nothing’s easy. Bonus points to Rich Brennan for mentioning that Dobson’s offense was “crazy.” I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE.
3. Sasha Banks should be shown arriving at every arena.
4. The Sasha and Bayley confrontation building to the announcement of an Iron Man Match (!) in the MAIN EVENT (!!) of the next TakeOver special was pitch-perfect. Sasha respects what Bayley did in Brooklyn, but Bayley’s still not Sasha Banks. Bayley’s proud of what she accomplished, and isn’t going to demurely stand in the background and take it. They shared a moment, but they’re still Bayley and Sasha. That’s perfect. I can’t wait to see this match, and I hope they use the post-match to do a Flair and Steamboat to Flair and Funk transition for whoever’s challenging next.
