You Can’t See John Cena, But Someone Has Seen His Facebook Password

The Internet!  A vast network of information designed for unparalleled global communication, but largely used for sharing pornography, posting cat GIFs, and broadcasting your most racist thoughts to the waiting public.  Social media presence is very important for the stars of the WWE, and the occasional mishap is known to happen.  Why, it feels like just yesterday that Michael Cole was using a gay slur against Josh Mathews on Twitter.  (Everyone else still remembers that, right?)  I guess the point I’m making in the most roundabout possible way is that the internet is a scary place, especially in the uncharted waters of Weak Password Lagoon.

WWE continued to learn that this weekend, as Wrestlezone reported that John Cena’s official WWE Facebook page was hacked over the weekend.  As you can see, the evidence is pretty damning.

Yep, that’s an old shirtless guy smoking a cigarette.  I shudder to think what kind of Google Alerts I just set off by typing that.  Anyways, BURNING QUESTIONS.

  1. Is it possible that this WASN’T a hack?  Maybe Cena just has a strange, Weird Twitter sense of humor?
  2. Maybe this is a family photo?  Does Cena have any odd, black-sheep uncles?
  3. Are those menthol Kools?  Does this guy share my dad’s cigarette preference?
  4. Why was the reader who sent this in to Wrestlezone also saving an image called “crying_businessman” to his hard drive?

There were other similar images posted, all of which have since been deleted, suggesting that this was indeed a hack.  Still, it was Cena’s most unpredictable move in months.  And let’s be real, I highly doubt that John Cena runs his own Facebook.  We’re talking about the most corporate-friendly guy in history, especially since 2005 when he had that surgery to remove the last human parts of him and turn him into the world’s first sentient Sports Entertainment Brand.