“Rumours” have been “swirling” that Stephanie McMahon is “pregnant” There are also “rumours” that I may use “too many airquotes” in my “daily life.”
We here at With Spandex try to keep the rumour-mongering to a minimum, because as much as it’s super fun to make stuff up, nobody wants to read about how the side of Rusev Lana stands on proves that she’s totally a cat person, or that Seth Rollins secretly prefers Tofurky Franks to the real thing, but is afraid of Triple H finding out because he’s a Ballpark guy. Also I’m lying because I would totally read those. But like any one random thing that fans think helps rationalize what happens on Raw, the Stephanie McMahon pregnancy rumour is picking up steam.
The justification from a number of “reputable wrestling journalistic sources” (okay those were necessary back off) is that Steph is “looking a little larger around the middle,” and that both her and Triple H had their arms around her stomach more than usual in an effort to hide it. Now to be fair, that pink and black giraffe print is pretty unforgiving when it comes to highlighting a ladies shape in a flattering way. But on slow news days, this is the kind of thing that ends up floating out of the woodwork and into popular discussion.
So is she pregnant, and being written off TV to film 12 Rounds In The Maternity Ward? If it’s a water birth, will that just be The Marine 7? Literally no idea. When she starts shooting everything from the waist up, holding comically large pillows and magazines in front of her, and wearing Triple H’s blazers, I would maybe then start asking. But as of right now, I would be reticent to believe people who pay too much attention to Steph’s midsection when she’s busy cutting verbal beatdowns to whoever gets in her way. I mean, she could have been bloated and crampy. She could have had Taco Bell for dinner. She could also have this entire private thing going on that is none of our business.
Personally, I’d just like more information on this whole Seth Rollins-Tofurky Frank thing. Can he even eat them after The Great Coney Island Incident of 2014? Does Daniel Bryan still have the monopoly on vegan/vegetarian product consumption? Do you think Lana would like to see pictures of my cat and listen to me tell her she’s pretty for like twenty minutes?
Guys, this is why we don’t make up rumours.
