Here are your quick and dirty, editorial-free WWE Smackdown Live results for March 28, 2017. The last Smackdown stop on the Road to WrestleMania featured a contract signing, and a lot of playing dress-up.
Be back here tomorrow for the full Best and Worst of Smackdown column.
WWE Smackdown Live Results:
– The show opened with Daniel Bryan coming out to moderate a contract signing between AJ Styles and Shane McMahon. Shane accused Styles of being too arrogant, and claimed it ultimately cost him the title against John Cena. Styles responds that Shane may have been in the ring with some of the biggest names in wrestling, but he’s never been in the ring with someone like him. At ‘Mania, Shane will find out exactly how “phenomenal” Styles is. After the contracts were signed, Styles refused to shake hands and walked out of the ring.
1. Carmella with James Ellsworth defeated Becky Lynch via disqualification. The match ended in a disqualification when a heated conversation between Alexa Bliss and Mickie James turned physical and spilled over into the ring, and Mickie attacked Carmella. Bryan came out and made a tag match between the four women.
2. Carmella with James Ellsworth and Alexa Bliss defeated Mickie James and Becky Lynch. The match was interrupted by Natalya’s music. Ellsworth used the distraction to get in front of Becky so Carmella could get a roll-up for the win.
After the match, Natalya jumped into the ring to join the scrum. Before it could be broken up by officials, Naomi’s music hit and she took down Natalya on the ramp. After chasing everyone out of the ring, Naomi took the mic and announced that she’s back from injury, and will officially join the Women’s Smackdown Championship match at WrestleMania.
–The Miz and Maryse come out to show the “shocking conclusion” to Total Bellas. They’re interrupted by the real John Cena and Nikki Bella, who took exception to the vignette wherein Fake John Cena refuses Fake Nikki’s proposal, saying he “hustles” fans by pretending to be something he’s not, and he doesn’t love her – only himself.
Cena says that the only reason Maryse didn’t come back was because WWE didn’t want her. He says he’s so loyal to WWE that people hate him for it, and the only movies Miz makes are cheap bootlegs of Cena’s. He then told Maryse that she just shows up, steals a paycheck, and is a waste of space, and that Miz is only using her to be on Total Divas. Everything Miz does isn’t real, but this Sunday “real” is gonna punch him in the face.
They’re not the “it” couple, they’re the “shhhhhhh it” couple. Cena speculated that maybe the Miz doesn’t have children because he has no penis. After walking away, the Miz turned back and tried to fight Cena, but was stopped by Maryse and the couple left up the ramp.
3. 10-Man Tag Team Match: Heath Slater and Rhyno, American Alpha, and Mojo Rawley defeated Breezango, The Usos, and Dolph Ziggler. Rawley was able to score the win for his team after delivering a forearm smash in the corner to Breeze.
4. Luke Harper Bray Wyatt. Wyatt took advantage of Harper’s hesitation before his forearm attack to get in position and hit him with a Sister Abigail to end the match. As Bray posed in the ring with his championship, Orton appeared on the Titantron, jamming a crucifix into the ground where Sister Abigail is supposedly buried.
