Another weekend has come and gone, so we ask the same question we have to ask every Monday in 2018: What did people get Big Mad Online™ about this time? Survey says . . . Shania Twain? Yes, Shania Twain, the 1999 Entertainer of the Year and the singer/co-writer of the 1997 hit song “That Don’t Impress Me Much.” I guess we’ll delve into how the kerfuffle started. Let’s go, girls…
An interview with Twain in The Guardian made the rounds on Sunday. In it, the Canadian musician says she would have voted for Donald Trump in 2016 if she were American. “I would have voted for him because, even though he was offensive, he seemed honest,” she said, shortly before her phone exploded from Twitter notifications, we assume.
Taking a page out of the Dril handbook (“Sorry. I’m sorry. I’m trying to remove it“), Twain swiftly posted an apology on Twitter:
“I would like to apologise to anybody I have offended in a recent interview with the Guardian relating to the American President. The question caught me off guard. As a Canadian, I regret answering this unexpected question without giving my response more context. I am passionately against discrimination of any kind and hope it’s clear from the choices I have made, and the people I stand with, that I do not hold any common moral beliefs with the current President. I was trying to explain, in response to a question about the election, that my limited understanding was that the President talked to a portion of America like an accessible person they could relate to, as he was NOT a politician. My answer was awkward, but certainly should not be taken as representative of my values nor does it mean I endorse him. I make music to bring people together. My path will always be one of inclusivity, as my history shows.”
That’s a roundabout way of saying, “Please stop tweeting at me for saying I’d vote for someone whose moral beliefs I don’t share.” Does saying you’d vote for someone you don’t have common beliefs with make sense? No. Does yelling at someone on Twitter solve anything? Also no. So let’s just make jokes instead. Cool?
Of course, the immediate response on Twitter involved too many people making the exact same joke:
https://twitter.com/OhNoSheTwitnt/status/988214642588741632
But not all of the jokes — and resigned comments of “Well, this sucks.” — making the rounds on Twitter were as predictable. We’ve collected some of the most impressive ones below. (Not as impressive as a rocket scientist or Brad Pitt, but we can’t all have such exacting standards, Shania.)
Welp, starting to rethink my initial plan to let Shania Twain guide all of my political, socioeconomic and spiritual beliefs
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) April 22, 2018
Now that my tattoo artist has finished inscribing this portrait of Morrissey, Kanye and Shania Twain onto my back, I’ll calmly log onto Twi-
— Dave Itzkoff (@ditzkoff) April 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/KrangTNelson/status/988179782641815552
Shania Twain wasn’t impressed by a guy who looked like 1997 Brad Pitt so I’m not exactly sure why we were expecting her to have good opinions
— Alpha Male (real) (@SortaBad) April 22, 2018
Shania Twain: I would've voted for Trump
the gays:pic.twitter.com/3mLw19cR28
— Ozemprah Thinfrey (@phagnificent) April 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/adamjk/status/988179352054566913
Shania Twain is a Trump supporter pic.twitter.com/f5RkLjASNo
— Matthew A. Cherry (@MatthewACherry) April 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/molly_knight/status/988213490090328064
Shania Twain is her pen name. Her real name is Shania Clemens
— Jill Twiss (@jilltwiss) April 22, 2018
“OK. So you’re the most qualified candidate in American history?” -discarded lyric to “That Don’t Impress Me Much”
— Louis Virtel (@louisvirtel) April 23, 2018
Just to get this straight…
Rocket scientist: ❌
Brad Pitt: ❌
Guy who used $30K of charity money to buy two paintings of himself: ✔ https://t.co/YEyi7fH0hl— Justin Shanes (@justinshanes) April 23, 2018
my favorite trump defense is “he says things that are cruel and that i would never condone but at least he MEANS them" https://t.co/q1grBdvO0U
— Ashley Feinberg (ashleyfeinberg.bsky.social) (@ashleyfeinberg) April 23, 2018
reminder that when people say “trump is honest” what they mean is “i appreciate that his racism is unvarnished and unapologetic” https://t.co/7SYMzw41Kh
— b-boy bouiebaisse (@jbouie) April 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/jpbrammer/status/988191648982151169
https://twitter.com/carolineframke/status/988178578310385664
https://twitter.com/jasonroeder/status/988224978309939200
Starting a GoFundMe to pay for laser removal of my tattoo of Shania Twain voting for Hillary
— pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat) April 23, 2018
Shania Twain Trending Because She Said She Would’ve Voted For Trump If She Could, Are We Surprised, Acting Like 53% Of White Women Didn’t Vote For Trump
— LANDO M.Ed (@LandoSoReal) April 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/bobbyfinger/status/988189046743687173
Ugh. Can we go back to photoshopping American Chopper memes and making fun of Mark Zuckerberg now?