Comment of the Week: Tyler Perry Is Shown No Mercy

If ever Kevin Smith gets sh*t talked on this website, fans come to his rescue. But Tyler Perry trash talking only invites more trash talking!

Chareth Cutestory

Perry’s getting into marriage counseling now? Somewhere Steve Harvey just spit cognac down the front of his purple zoot suit.

I’ve seen Steve Harvey sell out arenas. If he soils a zoot suit there’s another on stand by. Of course, there are as many angles on dissing Tyler Perry as there are Tyler Perry movies starring Tyler Perry.

GenePoolParty

Tyler Perry’s The Bible: I Can Deuteronomy All By Myself

Moose

*Tyler Perry’s inner monologue after writing Tyler Perry’s screenplay*

Ha ha! Oh, Tyler Perry, that’s just so Tyler Perry of Tyler Perry!

Ooh, but what about the tagline of his new movie, which we so laboriously recreated using quotes from reviews?

Larry
It is unfair to ridicule this movie with mentioning the tagline: “Seduction is the Devil’s playground.” The format being, “[Noun form of verb] is the [possessive noun] [place].”

Imagination is the plumber’s kindergarten.

Laughter is the philanthropist’s haberdashery.

Now you try!

There was one staunch Tyler Perry defender, but we couldn’t tell if he/she was serious:

arawdog1

this movie will be the one most remember in the future times when all his achievemetnts in the art world are shown, only until then will anyone get the true meaning of his legacy

Meanwhile, this comment from the Clint Eastwood considers directing Jersey Boys thread wins the award for “most factual.”

Ben Smith:
Mr. Mancini,

First, I perceived no problem with the performances in “Gran Torino,” and the film prospered from its rawness, the sense of truth deriving from its unvarnished nature. Eastwood has stated that he worked more extensively with the young Hmong actors, and to the extent that any inconsistencies existed, they would not necessarily have been solved with a couple more takes, because we are talking about amateur actors, not professionals who are going to be able to make refined adjustments on the fly. But again, I did not perceive any problems. Adolescents tend to be instinctive in their behavior and erratic in their moods, so to suggest anything polished would have constituted a mistake. Again, “Gran Torino” draws plenty of power from its sense of rawness.

Second, Eastwood is probably the greatest director of actors in the history of movies. Since 1992, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has nominated a performance in an Eastwood-directed film for an Academy Award ten different times (not including two acting nominations for Eastwood himself), and the institution’s voting members have awarded an acting Oscar to someone in an Eastwood film on five of those occasions. As longtime film journalist Peter Biskind wrote in the April 1993 edition of “Premiere” magazine, “Eastwood’s method works. It lends his pictures a fresh, improvisatory, realistic flavor.”

Not a lot of people go straight to a quote from 1993 to prove their points in comments sections, so we applaud you, Mr. Smith. And we thank you for lending these comments sections an air of formality and refinement.

The top Roger Ebert is dead comment:

Elliot Arthur

Goodnight and good chins, sweet prince.

The mortician prepared his body with one thumb up and one thumb down because death is confusing when money is involved. (That comment was a reference to our Frotcast sign-off, “Good night and good chins,” though that probably doesn’t make it less offensive. Still, well timed.)

And if we’re going to keep sh*t talking. The most obvious target is Courtney Love. She is the new face of E-Cigarettes, after all.

ChinoMoreno

I haven’t hated her so much since she smoked Kurt.

But the much coveted Comment of the Week goes to Alcoholics Gratuitous on the Red-Band trailer for This is the End:

Alcoholics Gratuitous

All of the artwork in James Franco’s house should have been portraits of James Franco.

As always, use the comments section below to nominate for next week.