This Week in Incest: Things you shouldn’t tell your son

Another week has gone by and another batch of characters were caught sleeping with their relatives. Also, for the third Friday in a row, I have resisted using the term “tabooty call.” Shit. What’s in store for you this time around? Even more layers of screwed-upness are revealed on “Bates Motel,” Joss Whedon discusses the addition of twincest to “The Avengers,” and everything about “Behind the Candelabra” remains creepy. (Spoilers, of course.)


Game of Thrones: On this week’s episode of “Game of Thrones,” Gilly’s incest baby almost gets a name! The baby will be named something other than “Randall,” which is Sam’s father’s name, so that’s a start in the right direction. Now to eliminate all other men’s names but one. The point was almost moot for directly after the subject of naming the tot is broached, a White Walker comes looking for the youngin’ — but fat, newly brave Sam totally defeats him. It looks like Baby Incest will live to see another week.

Bates Motel: Much to what is I’m sure our collective disappointment, this week’s season finale of “Bates Motel’ did not feature that character named Ra’uf. But holy hell, was there some incest. We find out the reason Norma is so messed-up as a human being, and it’s because her older brother raped her repeatedly while she was growing up, beginning when she was 13. Up until this point, Norma has not told a single soul about the abuse, but she finally decides she needs someone to know. And of course, that someone is not the therapist she sees or a trusted friend, but her own teenage son Norman, already a walking disaster of a kid. Norman reacts to the news by giving his mom some kisses on the lips, and the cycle perpetuates.

True Blood: The 5th season of “True Blood” came out on DVD this week, and if you buy it, you’ll get to relive that vampire-style incest between Eric and his sorta-sister Nora.


The Last Days of Anne Boleyn: More Anne Boleyn! Anne Boleyn is so hot these days. She’s totally the new Abraham Lincoln. “Last Days” is a BBC doc all about the brother-loving queen and her brutal death.

The Avengers 2: Earlier this month, it was revealed that Marvel would be adding incestuous mutant twins Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch to the superhero sequel, and this week, Joss Whedon gave an interview about the controversial pair, stating: “They”re not there to make things easier. I”m not putting any characters in the movie that will make things easier.” Does that mean they’re in there to make out??

Hjemlengsel: Norwegian incest, anyone? In the works is a new film from director Liv Ullmann, whose previous Jessica Chastain-starring movie “Miss Julie” will be released next year. Hjemlengsel” (a suggestion for Gilly’s son?) will tell the story of an unhappy dance instructor (is there any other kind?) who discovers she has a secret brother… and then falls in love with him.

Behind the Candelabra: The incest in HBO’s Liberace drama is merely implied, but it’s super creepy nevertheless. The gist: Liberace insists that his boyfriend Scott undergo plastic surgery so he’ll look more like Liberace. A fan then mistakes Scott for Liberace’s son, which totally turns Liberace on, and kissing ensues. A resounding “yikes” on all possible levels.