Six-time wrestling World Champion, four-time galaxy guardian, and pantsless vodka advocate Dave Bautista hasn’t been subtle about his opinions of the 45th President of the United States, from his tentative plan to leave the country if Donald Trump is re-elected to comments on how much he’d like to Batista Bomb him.
in his latest video, the WWE Hall of Famer threw shade at the [checks notes] fellow WWE Hall of Famer, imitating his irregular speech pattern to “thank” the President for his response to COVID-19, ask about tiger purchasing protocol, and beg for a job in the Space Force. You can watch the clip and read the transcript below.
— Super Duper Dave Bautista (@DaveBautista) May 18, 2020
“Hello Mr. President, Super Duper Dave Bautista here. Sorry I’m all sweaty, I just finished my morning workout, because I was inspired by you because I see what amazing shape you are, it’s really beautiful. I just want to say, you’re doing, you’re doing a great job, you’re doing a great job Mr. President. I know there’s almost 90,000 people dead, if it wasn’t for you it could’ve been like, uh, 8 trillion, so thank you. You’re doing an amazing job. You can ask anyone, anyone will tell you. You’re doing an amazing job, it’s really beautiful. It’s tremendous. Also, I can’t wait to read your Twitter today and hear you blame Obama for more stuff because he’s bad. He’s bad, you’re good, he’s bad. You can ask anyone. It’s beautiful, it’s beautiful, it’s really tremendous. And also I heard Don Jr. say you could get a tiger for like $2,000, and I just wanna know is one, where do I pick up my tiger, and B, can I borrow $2,000? Or I thought maybe, maybe if you have a job for me in Space Corps, because I know anything, I know a lot about Space Corps, probably more than anybody, I probably know more than anybody, about Space Corps. So anyway, thank you Mr. President, you’re doing a great job. Heil Trump, heil Trump.”
My biggest wish is that since WrestleMania ran this year without any fans, WWE would overcompensate for next year’s show, bring in as many celebrity guests as humanly possible, and find a way to get Trump and Batista in the same room. I want to see how far The Donald could walk inside that pit of danger.