WWE Hall of Famer and current Monday Night Raw General Manager Kurt Angle has as secret.
For the past several weeks, Corey Graves and Raw General Manager Kurt Angle have been secretly discussing some sensitive information that could not only threaten The Olympic Hero’s career, but might just tear his family apart. On Raw, Angle will reveal the details to the world.
The Raw GM will make the revelation alongside a loved one, whose identity has yet to be disclosed. Who is Angle bringing to Raw, and what will they have to say? No matter what, the WWE Hall of Famer’s life and career are about to change forever.
With the reveal set for tonight’s Raw, we thought it’d be fun to recap all the latest news, rumors and gossip, and throw in a few suggestions of our own.
It’s Stephanie McMahon
From a longtime wrestling fan and regular Raw viewer point of view, this seems like the most likely call. It’s the conclusion we jumped to in last week’s Best and Worst of Raw column:
The show goes off the air with a hint about the Kurt Angle THIS WILL DESTROY ME text messages, with a bit about how he doesn’t care if people know, and how he’s going to invite the person on the other end of the phone to Raw next week. Also, he loves them.
That’s Stephanie McMahon, right? She’s been off TV since WrestleMania. Triple H knocked her through a table, so they’ve probably been having (kayfabe) marital problems. Kurt Angle has a previously established love of Stephanie, and wouldn’t it “ruin him” and get him fired if Triple H found out he was sleeping with his wife during a trial separation or whatever? God knows there isn’t a reason to bring over a legendary ex-WWE guy who spent a decade in TNA unless they’re gonna lose to Triple H.
Kurt and Stephanie have a long and torrid romantic history, as seen in this compilation video helpfully entitled, Stephanie Mcmahon Hot Sexy Lip Kiss Kurt Angle.
Plus, how long can Stephanie go without being the center of attention on Raw?
It’s Dixie Carter
In a recent edition of Bischoff on Wrestling, Eric Bischoff (jokingly) “leaked” information that Kurt Angle’s secret is a rehash of one of TNA’s worst angles and that former TNA President Dixie Carter was coming in as Angle’s love interest.
Uh, all right … I’m sure I’m going to be burning a bridge with this one, cause I’m not supposed to know about this. And hopefully, nobody gets into any trouble over this because leaks happen, right? But you remember the storyline with AJ and Claire? … WWE is ripping that off. Dixie is Claire and Kurt is AJ.
He wasn’t serious, but Dixie did just appear on a WWE Network special about Angle, and WWE’s been weirdly all about bringing in TNA talent for the past several years. NXT’s basically an episode of Impact with Kana on it right now. The “LOL, what if” was enough to drive Reddit crazy and get Bischoff’s comments shared across the Internet, usually without the “he’s not being serious” disclaimer.
If you haven’t seen them together, Dixie and Angle have the weird on-screen chemistry of an aging soccer mom and a sentient vibrator with rage issues.
Maybe It’s Karen Jarrett
Kurt has already done a “this could destroy my family” angle once before, with his ex-wife Karen in TNA. And it even featured Samoa Joe!
The story went on forever, involved Karen leaving him for Jeff Jarrett — her new husband in real life, too — and turned Kurt from a cool but concerning ex-WWE guy into haggard psychopath who tried to murder everyone involved with an axe. Thankfully he was stopped by ex-New York Jets linebacker Bart Scott? TNA is weird.
Let’s hope it’s not the Jarretts, and remember that every bad wrestling story eventually involves Jeff Jarrett.
What If It’s Darren Young?
Who says the love interest has to be a woman? Darren Young is WWE’s first openly gay wrestler, WWE teased making his character gay for a while after he came out, and he’s ready to come back to television after hyper-extending his elbow back in January. Would WWE be progressive enough to do that? Would it just get played for shock value? Would fans react to it positively?
Sadly I think we know the answers to all of those questions, but hey.
It’s An Illegitimate Son
“I love you” doesn’t have to be a love interest at all. Maybe it’s a relative? That’s what another rumor says. The hint from Raw was meant to mislead us, and it’ll turn out that Kurt Angle has an illegitimate son, probably an active wrestler on the WWE roster. That could tear his family apart, right?
The name that gets tossed around during these rumors is OBVIOUSLY Chad Gable. Gable has Kurt’s crazy amateur wrestling ability and his love of USA-themed jackets and singlets, and American Alpha has been curiously phased out over the past few months. At the same time, Gable’s been popping up as a recurring character on Smackdown Live, bonding with Sami Zayn and wrestling AJ Styles.
So what if it’s Jason Jordan playing the illegitimate son? Kurt Angle’s 48, Jordan is 28 (despite having been in WWE since 2011), it could work.
Wait, what if it’s BOTH of them? And their secret familial bond is what made them so close? What if Kurt Angle made his own Team Angle 30 years ago and didn’t realize it?
It’s Probably Hornswoggle
Hornswoggle hasn’t been gone long enough for me to stop assuming he’s the pot of gold at the end of every WWE angle’s rainbow.